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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28703436">What We Cannot Promise</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orange_juice_and_toothpaste/pseuds/orange_juice_and_toothpaste'>orange_juice_and_toothpaste</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Arranged Marriage, I'm Bad At Tagging, Kageyama Tobio &amp; Oikawa Tooru Are Related, Kageyama stans don't be mad at me uwu, M/M, Royalty AU, but not too angsty, no beta we die like daichi, other characters but I'm not going to tag every one</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:07:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>23,261</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28703436</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orange_juice_and_toothpaste/pseuds/orange_juice_and_toothpaste</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Prince Shouyou of Karasuno has just received the worst news of his life: his arranged marriage with Prince Tobio of Seijoh. When they finally meet, Shouyo has no idea if they can ever fall in love, and after one fateful evening, his engagement changes hands to...Prince Tooru, Tobio's older brother. For Shouyo, who has only ever wanted to be loved, can Tooru provide what he cannot promise?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hinata Shouyou/Oikawa Tooru</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>92</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Basically Kagehina</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Beginning of the Ending</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prince Shouyou gazed outside his window, drawing his shawl just a little closer around his shoulders. His window was positioned in just the perfect place to watch the setting sun dip below the horizon, painting the sky a magnificent shade of orange. In the courtyard below, he could see his two brothers playing a game. Even from his height in the tower, he could still hear their laughter. Any other evening, Shouyou would get up, abandon his melancholy and join them. This was not any other evening.</p><p>His mind drifted to the dinner he had walked away from, not hours before now. His father, King of the kingdom of Karasuno, was never one to shy away from a surprise. Shouyou should’ve guessed something was up when it seemed his father was hiding something, barely concealing his own excitement. Never the one to beat around a bush, his slightly younger brother Kei finally confronted their father on whatever news he so obviously wanted to tell them.</p><p>“Well, sons, one of you will be joining a new family soon,” their father had said, practically spitting out his wine as he laughed. Shouyou had felt excited, then. Had Princess Kiyoko finally got permission to marry his older brother Ryunosuke? Or had Tadashi of the nobility made his intentions towards Kei known? Then, their father kept talking.</p><p>“Shouyou, my boy, you’ll make Seijoh a fine prince indeed.”</p><p>Those words echoed in his head as he watched his brothers, the light of the setting sun slowly dimming. Torches were being lit along the walls in concordance. Eventually, his brothers pushed each other, and disappeared back into the castle. The courtyard was empty, devoid of its usual occupants. His legs were starting to cramp, reminding him how long he had stood at the window. He stepped away, stretching both legs as he did so. He hadn’t sat down in his usual chair this time, and in truth, hadn’t even meant to stand as long as he did.</p><p>Marriage was something Shouyou knew about, but never imagined would happen to him. In some ways, it was really his naivete to blame for that. In others, Shouyou didn’t imagine there <em>was </em>anyone he could imagine marrying. For whatever cosmic reason, many kingdoms had ended up with royal and noble offspring around the same time, providing an endless list of potential suitors, and yet, Shouyou hardly knew any of them. Balls were common enough among their social circles, but he had always prioritized wrangling in his two brothers over socializing. After all, both Ryunosuke and Kei liked to cause problems on purpose and Shouyou often had to play mediator for them. He tried to think of the two Siejoh brothers, Tobio and Tooru. He’d seen them from a distance at the balls. Neither of his own brothers seemed to like the princes of Seijoh, so Shouyou had never had a reason to speak with them. But now?</p><p>Shouyou shook his head, unable to get a nagging feeling out of it. Cruelly, he turned to the floor length mirror in his room and took in the sight of himself. His hair was much more mussed than usual, his clothes wrinkled and the fists holding his shawl had stark white knuckles. <em>How pathetic</em>, he thought of himself. <em>This</em> person would be marrying prince Tobio? <em>This </em>person was given up by his father to secure resources? The Kingdom of Karasuno had once rivaled the larger kingdoms, but a series of poor leadership and bad harvests had crippled them, cutting down the size of their territory by half. The Crow Mountains, a long ridge of stiff peaks that had once halved the kingdom was now its border. The territory past it now belonged to other kingdoms, who promised to take care of their former subjects. Shouyou’s marriage, according to his father, would be the first of many steps towards gaining that territory back, and then some.</p><p>Shouyou absently gazed around the room as he realized what had actually happened. He was the second prince of three. Ryunosuke was the crown prince who would one day take the throne, and princess Kiyoko had already expressed interest. Kei was already being courted by a noble’s son. And Shouyou? A suitor had never appeared to court him and probably never would. He felt tears slide down his face. He was just a piece of meat conveniently labeled ‘prince’ to sell off to the highest bidder. He had no more worth than that.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>A week had passed by him in a haze. The rest of the castle prepared for his three month long courtship, to be ended with his wedding. It was customary as it was tedious. Partly, it was so the fiancés wouldn’t be blinded by the people they married as well as to get acquainted with the kingdom they were marrying into. He tried to remind himself that even arranged marriages could result in love, like his parents’ had, but he knew better. Even if he had never spoken to them, all the royalings knew of the Seijoh princes, the charming Tooru and cold Tobio. Shouyou didn’t particularly see himself as special, and he was sure Tobio would agree. This is what he thought about as his family hugged him goodbye, a few tears gracing the eyes of the family.</p><p>“If they give you any trouble,” Ryunosuke was saying to him as they let go of each other, “I’ll come out there and give them what for.” He made a show of flexing his arm. Not feeling up for jokes, Shouyou only smiled as he then turned to Kei.</p><p>“Don’t say something stupid and ruin the whole thing,” his younger brother put bluntly. Of course, Shouyou knew this was his way of saying ‘I’m worried about you, please be safe’, but it still stung. He only lightly nodded in response before hugging him. Kei hesitated a moment before patting his back. They pulled apart and Shouyou went to his carriage. He dared not look behind him as he climbed in for fear that he would refuse to leave if he did.</p><p>He stared sullenly out the other window, committing to memory the scenery of Karasuno as the door closed, and they were off. He began to cry. How was it that his brothers gave him the silent treatment the entire week, only to say something just before he left? Perhaps, some rational part of his brain suggested, they were only thinking of him and were trying not to burden him right before he left? But that wasn’t what he wanted at <em>all</em>. He wanted them to pretend everything was okay and Shouyou wasn’t being shipped off with a bow. He wanted to have a sleepover again, like they used to when they were younger and excited about life. He wanted to hug and cry with them over a bottle of wine, and then be chastised by their parents for drinking so late into the night. If his own brothers couldn’t even tell what he wanted, how would his fiancé, whom he never met?</p><p>He cried, and cried, until at some point the scenery of his journey changed and instead of thick forests of pine, he saw vast fields of golden wheat, practically shimmering in the now midday sun. <em>I’m in Seijoh</em>, he thought sullenly. Carefully, he took a handkerchief from his sleeve and gently dabbed at his eyes. It wouldn’t do anyone any good to show up looking like a <em>mess</em>. Fairly confident he wiped away any visible discomfort, Shouyou considered the life ahead of him.</p><p>Blood heirs were important as they always had been, but not every heir was entrusted to keep the line going. As such, same sex unions were reserved for second and third children as it was more convenient to pawn off a third son than it was to try and get a daughter. Perhaps Tobio would resent him for it. Perhaps, the other prince had already known his marriage was nothing more than a transaction and would be bitter. What if the prince had loved someone else, now forever barred from his true love? Shouyou wondered what he would do if his husband started an affair. He wouldn’t be that mad, he supposed. If it were the other way around, he’d rather love someone who would love him back too.</p><p>As deep in thought as he was, Shouyou hardly realized the carriage had stopped. Dimly, he imagined there were ruffians outside, demanding the prince be handed over, or else. Word would get to his would-be husband, and then Prince Tobio would tear his own kingdom up to find him. And then they would fall in love.</p><p>The door to the carriage opened and a hand reached in, stretched in a friendly offer to help him out. Taking a deep breath, he gently grasped the hand, and left the carriage.</p><p>Immediately, his breath was taken away. Balls had always been held elsewhere between the kingdoms and so Shouyou had never seen Seijoh’s castle before. It was <em>dizzyingly </em>tall, with fierce towers that seemed to puncture the sky. Even its entrance, with a full flight of stairs was amazing to behold. He half wanted to comment on it, only to remember who and where he was. Taking away his gaze from the building in front of him, he finally looked at who was awaiting him at the bottom of the steps. Two men, one just a bit taller than the other, were watching him with different expressions. The one on the left, the taller one, had brown slicked back hair. He seemed to regard Shouyou like a new puzzle to study. The other one on the right had black hair combed neatly, his bangs covering his forehead. His expression was intense, like he was holding back from saying something rude. Shouyou had seen the expression on both his brothers’ faces before and knew nothing good could come of it. He was suddenly self-conscious of his hair. Of course, his mother had fussed over it this way and that, making sure it looked presentable for once, but there was nothing she could do about the color. It was joked that because the sun set on the western borders of Karasuno, instead of disappearing for the night he was born, it went to his hair instead. Once a symbol of pride for him, he couldn’t help but notice how <em>different</em> it was to the princes’.</p><p>He smiled softly and strode up to them. Ignoring their expressions, he bowed. “Your Majesties,” he said as he rose back up. A tick of annoyance shot through him as he realized both were unfairly tall, and he had to look up at them. Neither said anything and for a moment, Shouyou wondered what he’d already done wrong. Then, the one on the left nudged his companion, and words were being spoken.</p><p>“Prince Shouyou!” The man practically shouted. “I am Prince Tobio and this is my brother, Prince Tooru! Please follow us!” And with that, Prince Tobio spun on his heel and began the long trek up the stairs. Shouyou glanced over at the other prince, and immediately glanced away. Prince Tooru had an expression that was much too intense for him and Shouyou was grateful when he saw him gesture to follow in his periphery.</p><p>They caught up with Tobio at the top of the steps, Shouyou a little breathless from the sudden exercise. The grand doors were pulled open and the little party of three stepped inside.</p><p>The floor was made of pure marble, he was sure, and the pillars that supported the ceiling almost looked as if they had been carved out of the same piece. The dark swirls inside the stone reminded him of water and it was rather captivating. Someone cleared their throat in front of him and he realized he’d been staring at the floor. He looked up to see Tobio glaring down at him and he practically jumped.</p><p>“The castle was built in the year 567, after the fall of the former Kingdom of…” The prince drawled on, like he was reading off of some notes. Shouyou blinked and wished he could laugh. His first moments in this new place, and he was getting was history lesson? Again, he glanced at the other prince, just to see if this is what his welcome was supposed to be. <em>No dice</em>, Shouyou thought. Tooru seems to have expected such a history lesson, and as Tobio finally drew a close, they began to move to a different area, where the lesson picked up again.</p><p>All like that, Shouyou’s tour of the castle was filled with rather pointless drivel about history. That same rational part of his brain knew he should be listening, if only out of respect, but the absurdness of his situation overrided this sentiment. His first conversation with his fiancé wasn’t even a conversation at all. He barely listened as he drifted alongside the two princes, nodding and humming every so often like he knew what was being said. At some point, Tobio had stopped looking so angry, and he seemed much more relaxed than when Shouyou first laid eyes on him. Suddenly,</p><p>“The library has been called the true heart of the castle, and of the kingdom at large. It is one of the largest collections to date, filled with everything from historical records to legendary manuscripts from kingdoms’ past.” The three of them passed through an opened door into, perhaps, one of the most beautiful rooms Shouyou had ever seen. Forgetting himself for a moment, he walked past the princes and turned about. The entire room was dedicated to the storage of books and manuscripts and scrolls and everything Shouyou thought a library should have. He could <em>just </em>see the ceiling, and there were even shelves that reached it! He gazed at the books more at eye level, one immediately calling out to him. On its spine it was titled <em>The Miraculous Mirages</em>. He almost gasped, half reaching out to the book. He thought all the Glass Mirror series had been lost to time! But here it was! The final book, the one Shouyou had always searched for! Feeling excited for the first time since his arrival, he felt the need to speak without provocation.</p><p>“I love to read,” he said casually, only having eyes for the book he was still reaching for.</p><p>“You don’t look like it.” <em>Ah</em>. His hand froze. <em>Of course</em>, he thought to himself. He half turned towards the princes. Tobio <em>would </em>think that, wouldn’t he?</p><p>“I get that a lot,” Shouyou lied, retracting his hand to himself. Suddenly, the size of the library felt stifling. <em>Idiot</em>, he thought. He was supposed to be following the princes and yet he had derailed the whole tour, just because he was excited for a <em>book</em>. His face felt hot and he looked away.</p><p>“My apologies, your highnesses, but I…am quite tired from my trip, if there’s any way I could…?” He chanced a glance. <em>Oh no</em>. Tobio was literally glaring at him now and Shouyou hadn’t enough strength to look away.</p><p>“Fine, I suppose we can cut this short for you, Prince Shouyou.” Shouyou might’ve well as just slapped the man if he wanted the same coldness he received. He could feel himself withering under the glare, too stunned to even look away. When Tobio finally made a move to leave, Shouyou felt like he had failed some kind of test. He hardly even thought to look at Tooru to see if this too was supposed to happen.</p><p>Silently, Shouyou followed the brothers, lost in his own head. How had he already messed up so badly? When they parted, would the brothers laugh at him? Complain about his poor manners at their hospitality? Who else would take time out of their days just to give a tour to another prince? Would they question his constitution? His character? Even now, as they passed through the maze of the castle, would Shouyou be hidden from the public, just so he wouldn’t embarrass the crown? As they passed numerous servants, he could feel their piercing gazes. Was he just an exotic bird for them? A pet to tout around before locking away?</p><p>Feeling fully drained, he almost walked into the brothers as they stopped in front of a door.</p><p>“These will be your quarters until the w-wedding,” Tobio said, stuttering a little. Oh joy, he was so displeased he couldn’t even say the word without grimacing. With that, and nothing else, Tobio pushed the door open for him. Shouyou stepped in.</p><p>“We’ll send someone to bring you to lunch soon, don’t worry about it.” Prince Tooru finally spoke to him, though Shouyou hardly paid it any attention, already so lost in a mental map of how exactly he screwed everything up. The door closed behind him, the sound of it echoing in his ears. This was his cage, wasn’t it? So high in one of those towers, with no recollection of how to get anywhere else he’d been shown.</p><p>The room was practically barren, no style or semblance of it in sight. Though he only knew luxury, Shouyou imagined this was the least luxurious room in all the castle. The four post bed was plain with white sheets and pillows, not even curtains to draw around it. The fireplace on the right wall seemed cold and unused, though soot still covered a bit of it and with no firewood in sight. The chairs and sofa looked to be an older style and the closet next to the door creaked as he pulled it open to look inside. He assumed the door to the far left led to the bathroom, which he was right about after checking. The only interesting part of the room was the window that jutted out of the room itself, a bench built directly into the wall. Stealing a cushion off one of the chairs, he took it to the window, lodging himself into it. Cruelly, the window overlooked a large courtyard. He could imagine his brothers there, listening to them rough house as they fought over their game.</p><p>Suddenly, Shouyou decided to abandon the mental map of the castle he had failed to make and considered the outside of it. He was sure there were three towers, yet, he felt he hadn’t gone up as high as the tallest one. Looking into the courtyard, a picture of the castle built itself in his mind. The castle itself was constructed like a diamond, with three towers heralding the very front of it. The tower he was in over looked a courtyard in the middle of the castle, and with no other tower in sight, he realized he was in a fourth tower, one you couldn’t see from the outside. Truly, even the courtyard was darkened, despite the high afternoon sun. He had been overshadowed by the castle and locked away in the one spot no one could see. He became nearly hysterical as laughter bubbled out of him. It was too much, too soon. It was too poetic, too absurd, too coincidental. Was this foreshadowing of his own future? Was he forever to be kept hidden away in the shadows, never to see the setting sun again? And why was the room so <em>cold</em>?</p><p>Realizing his laughter had turned to weeping, Shouyou decided he would <em>not </em>be joining anyone for lunch.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Oh my gosh the Oihina brain rot is real I just really wanted to get this out there. I'm not sure what my updating schedule will be yet but I do plan on updating at least once a week. As of right now, I already have seven chapters written and I think this will end with about ~twelve in total. This isn't like anything else I've written so I appreciate anyone reading it. That being said, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed! Tune in next time for the Oikawa supremacy agenda!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. A Brother's Advice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prince Tooru felt his eyebrow twitch as he leaned against the doorway of his former classroom. It was here that he and his little brother Tobio had been mostly raised, regaled with the long histories and stories of their kingdom they were to inherit one day. Of course, Tobio was being supremely annoying, just as he had when they were kids.</p><p>“You’re going to tear a hole in the floor if you keep pacing like that,” he chastised, even if he knew it would fall of deaf ears.</p><p>“I just don’t understand!” Tobio exclaimed, for the fourth time since they got there. “He didn’t <em>seem </em>all that tired when we got to the library, and then he acts like we bit him, or something.”</p><p>Tooru scoffed. Was Tobio that socially inept? “You literally told him he looked stupid.”</p><p>“No, I didn’t.”</p><p>“Yes, you did.”</p><p>“I just said he didn’t look like a reader! I was surprised and it was a compliment!”</p><p>“That’s the same thing as calling him stupid.”</p><p>“Argh!” Tobio groaned, finally stopping in his tracks. He pulled out a chair, one much too small for either of them, and plopped down onto it. He put his face in his hands. “I really insulted him, huh?”</p><p>“I’ll say. I would even wager he was scared of you. You made that face at him again, the one that looks like you’d kill someone. Here he is, a little prince from a foreign land, landing in the claws of a dragon like you.”</p><p>“Me?” Tobio looked up from his hands. “What about you? You followed us the whole time, don’t you have anything better to do?”</p><p>“What, I can’t express interest in my little brother’s fiancé?”</p><p>Tobio blushed. “That’s not the point. Besides, what do <em>you </em>even think about him, since you know all about how he feels?”</p><p>Tooru paused as he thought about it. “He’s naïve, for starters. He’s a prince yet he’s impressed by every little show of wealth and spooked by either of us. He wasn’t even really listening to the tour and I would guess he thinks too much, especially when he forgot to be scared of us and drooled over the library.”</p><p>It was Tobio’s turn to scoff. “You make him sound like a bad actor. Not everyone is constantly putting up a front like you.”</p><p>Ignoring the insult, Tooru continued. “I think he’s probably the romantic type, who thinks life should be more like a novel and gets too disappointed when it isn’t. His feelings are easy to bruise and he wears it on his face. He’s either going to refuse to eat with us or he’ll show up anyways and hardly speak.”</p><p>Before Tobio could refute or agree with him, there was a servant who knocked at the door beside him. “Your majesties,” the woman curtsied. “Prince Shouyou has informed me he isn’t feeling well and will not be joining you for lunch.” She curtsied again and walked away. Tooru turned back to Tobio, smirking at him.</p><p>His younger brother sighed. “Fine, you were right. He’s a bleeding heart. What do I do now?” He sounded halfway desperate. Tooru remembered that this wasn’t just a visiting prince they were talking about, but Tobio’s future husband. Shouyou wasn’t a good match, not at all. Even within the first hours of knowing each other, Tobio shoved his foot in his mouth and Shouyou took it personally. If Tobio didn’t apologize soon, neither would be on the same page for a while.</p><p>“Go to the kitchen and grab some food for him. Apologize, sincerely, and say you weren’t thinking about the way your <em>compliment</em> sounded. Even if he doesn’t accept the food, leave it there. Pride can only carry you so far, he’s bound to get hungry,” he advised. Tobio nodded along. As Tooru finished, his brother stood up.</p><p>“Right.” As simple as ever, Tobio passed by him, leaving him in their former classroom.</p><p>“Right,” Tooru said to no one. Then he sighed, also to no one. He absently ran a hand through his hair. What was their father <em>thinking</em>? Karasuno had nothing to offer Seijoh, even if it <em>was</em> Shouyou marrying into their family. Yet, Karasuno was the only one who could gain from the union. Why not get some other prince to marry Tobio? Like Nekoma’s Kenma or even just a noble from their own kingdom? Why did it have to be <em>Shouyou </em>of all people? He seemed like an airhead and he couldn’t imagine such a soft person falling love with Tobio. Why had their father set Tobio up like this? What could Seijoh possibly gain from it? Feeling rather concerned about this, Tooru decided to make his way to lunch. Perhaps he could subtly grill his father for answers.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Except, his father never showed up for lunch either. <em>Dammit</em>, Tooru thought again as he looked over documents in his personal study.</p><p>“Are you moping again?”</p><p>“You know some people would have your head for speaking to a prince like that,” Tooru said dangerously.</p><p>Hajime snorted. “You’re not one of them.”</p><p>He deflated. “You’re right, I’m just irritated.” His father’s health had been on the slow decline, but he had always found strength to eat meals with his sons.</p><p>“So much irritation is gonna give you early wrinkles.”</p><p>Tooru immediately stopped frowning, half consciously rubbing at the space between his eyebrows. “I think I’m afforded a little irritation. My father has, once again, gone galivanting around and making decisions without consulting me. But enough of that, what’ve you got on him?”</p><p>Suddenly, Hajime’s mildly amused expression was gone, replaced with a more serious one. From the stack of documents he’d been feeding Tooru, he handed the prince a small packet.</p><p>“Prince Shouyouu, aged twenty-two years, second son of the Karasuno royal family. He’s popular amongst his people, known for being kind and frequently seen using taxes to front projects for the poor, such as temporary shelters and workshops to train people as artisans.”</p><p>Tooru’s frown was back as he scribbled down <em>temporary shelters </em>and <em>workshops(?)</em> on a piece of parchment. “Why’ve I never heard about this before? Surely a prince doing such philanthropic work would be the gossip of the Kingdoms?”</p><p>Hajime smiled wryly next to him. “The people love their prince. Maybe they wanted him to themselves.” Tooru nodded, indicating for his lifelong friend to go on.</p><p>“Neither his brothers, crown Prince Ryunsoke or Prince Kei were talked much about. It seems they have their own interests while Prince Shouyou focused on the people. His love of books was another oft brought up topic, especially when in reference to their national library.”</p><p>“A ‘national’ library?”</p><p>“Yes, ‘national’. It seems Prince Shouyou convinced his father to invest in copying certain books from their own library and opening one for the general public to use, free of charge. Literacy was seen even in adults much older than the Prince.”</p><p>Tooru scribbled down <em>public library</em> underneath his earlier scribbles. Setting down his quill, he sat back in his chair reworking the mental image he’d had of the prince so far. A prince who personally oversaw such projects? Even managing to convince his king to invest in the public, with no returns? There was a reason Shouyou was popular, he seemed to actually pay attention to his people. Something his <em>own </em>father would be better to do. Is this why Shouyou was picked? No no, that’s not possible. It might be <em>one </em>reason, sure, but Tooru was just hearing about all this himself. If his father wanted the people of Seijoh to love them like that, why not just <em>do </em>what Shouyou did? They didn’t particularly need him for it. <em>There has to be something else</em>, Tooru thought to himself.</p><p>“Is that all?”</p><p>“It seems so. You can really only ask the people so many questions before they get suspicious. Most of this is even just from <em>being </em>there and seeing all the places the Karasuno insignia is at.”</p><p>“So no dark secret? No hidden lovers or illegitimate children?”</p><p>“None that my spies could find. As far as anyone knows, he’s among the cleanest princes around.”</p><p>Hmm. Tooru sent Hajime away, telling him to take the next few days off for his good work. He considered the prince sequestered away in the tower. There was definitely no way his charity was the only reason Shouyou was here. If that were the case, he’d have been paraded around, his father pointing to the next best thing the crown could offer their subjects. Life quality was always an issue, for any kingdom, but Seijoh seemed to get away with a <em>lot</em>. <em>No thanks to dear father</em>, Tooru thought bitterly. Their ties to other kingdoms ensured a level of economy that any could be jealous of, yet the poorest of their people saw nary a coin of it. Whatever his father’s reasons, Shouyou being a part of their family wouldn’t fix it. Tooru had to consider that, maybe, his father didn’t even really <em>intend</em> to fix it. Wouldn’t that be nice? Pulling some sappy prince away from his home just to make himself look good? What about Tobio, who now had to live forever with the man? And Shouyou himself, what did know about any of it? Had he conspired with his own father, suggested himself to get access to Seijoh’s wealth?</p><p>Actually, Tooru felt uncomfortable with that thought. The prince hadn’t seem like he had any hidden depth to him at first, but even this new information fit his image. Even if Shouyou had already surprised him, he didn’t think the prince was capable of such cunning. He was too open, too easy to read, or at least, it was easy for Tooru. Perhaps he would nudge Tobio a little more, to consider this new facet of his husband to-be. Maybe then they would fall in love.</p><p><em>Love</em>? The thought startled him. Why would love matter in any of this? If he was any more cynical, he’d be resentful on his brother’s behalf, but he’d already accepted that Shouyou wouldn’t be a good partner. Even now, Tooru was more sure than ever their marriage was a transaction, even more so than a normal arranged marriage. He just had to understand what Seijoh got from it. Love had nothing to do with it.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>A few days later, Tooru had to contend with the fact that his brother was a moron, actually, his whole <em>family </em>was a moron. Except him, Tooru was <em>smarter</em> than putting their new addition in the <em>one tower </em>with a <em>hole </em>in its roof <em>during the fall</em>. He half wanted to groan, watching Tobio twirl this way and that with a feverish prince in his arms.</p><p>He had been passing by the room, for no particular reason at all. Okay, so <em>maybe </em>Shouyou hadn’t appeared at a meal at all since his arrival, and <em>maybe </em>the fact that any food left for him wasn’t being eaten worried Tooru, a tiny bit. He really was just passing by, only to see Tobio calling out for a doctor, dramatically holding Shouyou.</p><p>“You moron,” he said crossly, stalking up to his brother. “Quit running around like a headless chicken. Hand him over and go find the doctor.” He noted slyly when Tobio seemed to hug the man closer to him, before finally handing the body over. The prince between them groaned as he was shifted around, his eyes fluttering open before closing again.</p><p>“I’ll take him to your room, meet us there.” With that, the brothers nodded at each other before taking off in separate directions. Hajime appeared before him, in that weird sneaky way he always does, looking worried.</p><p>“Shrimpy here got sick. Tobio’s already gone for the doctor.”</p><p>Hajime’s expression melted away before his eyebrow rose. “Shrimpy? He’s hardly smaller than you.”</p><p>“Whatever, he’s the one who has to get carried around. I’ll call him whatever I want.”</p><p>“Just make sure he can’t actually hear you. I’d feel bad if I insulted my brother-in-law for no reason.”</p><p>Tooru glanced down at the man. His face was bright and he felt hot, even through the layers of his clothes. His eyes were squeezed shut, like he was in pain, but he seemed unconscious. Hmm. His walking quickened, Hajime keeping up with him.</p><p>Finally, they reached the door, kicked it opened and made for the bed.</p><p>“Do we cover him up or let him cool down?” Hajime asked him as he gently laid Shouyou down. He thought about it.</p><p>“Well if he’s already so hot, wouldn’t it better to leave him like that?” He pointed at the lack of blankets.</p><p>“I thought you were supposed to sweat a fever out?”</p><p>“And I thought princes who valued their health stayed away from the sick ones,” a voice broke through their conversation. Both Tooru and Hajime looked away from the said sickly prince towards Tobio and the man with him. Doctor Ukai made no further comment as he went to the other side of the bed. Tobio came to stand next to Tooru and Hajime.</p><p>Immediately, Ukai felt Shouyou’s face. He forced one eye open, then the other. Finally, he looked up at the three men staring at him.</p><p>“Don’t just stand there,” he barked. “Be useful!”</p><p>In a flurry of orders and other barking, the three men made use of their skills. Well, more like physical labor. Divided up, they brought rags and ice and medicine around, appearing much more like a swarm of butterflies dancing in the air. Not one of the three men stopped to consider asking servants to help.</p><p>“So,” Tobio asked, a particular strain to his voice. “Is he okay?”</p><p>Ukai had sat down in a chair next to the bed (courtesy of Hajime). “Of course. The little bugger just has the cold. I’ll assume he has a weak stomach as to why he hasn’t been eating like he should. Throwing up all the time can seem worse than just going hungry. Go bother the kitchen for some soup. Liquids are probably all he’ll be able to eat for a minute.”</p><p>Nodding along, Tooru, Tobio and Hajime finally left the room.</p><p>“So, your room is now a sick bay.”</p><p>“Shut up. Why didn’t you use your’s?”</p><p>“He’s <em>your </em>husband. Won’t you be sharing the room soon anyways?” Of course, Tooru dodged the smack that came his way and he laughed at the embarrassed expression on his face. Except…something hard settled in his stomach. He decided not to think about it. It wasn’t the first time he pushed a feeling away, after all.</p><p>Also, the whole thing was annoying. What was Shouyou even <em>thinking</em>? Tooru thought the prince would know the difference between modesty and putting his own health at risk, didn’t he?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The foreshadow :). Anyways, I somehow COMPLETELY forgot to add some tags to this fic and I'm gonna go back and edit the first chapter (I dislike writing without indents but it formats really badly here so ew. I think I'm gonna try to aim for a sunday/monday schedule (I know I failed this time) ehe. Thank you for reading and tune in next week!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Mistakes in the Moonlight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prince Shouyou felt highly embarrassed. He’d woken up in someone else’s bed, a nest of drying or dried rags around him, the sun setting outside the window on the far wall. He pushed himself up, finding his back pressed against many pillows. A small headache pressed behind his forehead. He looked around, finding his surroundings unfamiliar.</p>
<p>The furniture present was in completely different places, as compared to his own room. The colors were different as well. He was swathed in sheets of teal and white, the curtains the same teal color. The furniture, not that he’d paid much attention to his own, was dark and glossy. A jacket was haphazardly laid across a blue and gold gilded couch, and it didn’t look like any he owned. Someone cleared their throat, and he looked over.</p>
<p>“How’re you feeling?” Prince Tobio had been watching him, leaning on the toes of his feet, ready to jump forward at any time.</p>
<p>Shouyou was surprised. The prince had come around to his room a few days ago to give a terse apology and leaving a lunch behind. Perhaps by traveling to a new place, Shouyou had gotten sick. However, that didn’t explain why he was in a new room. Seeing as Tobio was still waiting for an answer, he started talking.</p>
<p>“Better, thank you. I suppose the weather just got to me.”</p>
<p>“Why didn’t you tell anyone about your room?”</p>
<p>Shouyou titled his head. “What about it?”</p>
<p>“You mean, you didn’t realize it had a hole in the roof?”</p>
<p>Shouyou only shook his head in response. Tobio sighed, the tension holding him up leaving him. He stepped forward.</p>
<p>“You have to take better care of yourself, Shouyou.” It was the first time he’d been addressed by only his name, no title attached. In the light of the setting sun, Tobio almost looked the way Shouyou thought a foreign prince should. His skin was golden and his hair ruffled, probably from worry. His eyes were narrowed, and his lips were pressed with a fond sternness, as befitting a prince. Shouyou felt his cheeks heat up from the attention.</p>
<p>“I thought I was,” he admitted softly. Tobio took another few steps forward, arriving at the side of the bed.</p>
<p>“You’ll be using this room for a few days, until the roof is repaired. Until then,” the prince reached out, gently holding Shouyou’s hand. “Please eat with us.”</p>
<p>Shouyou was unable to look anywhere else but the man’s eyes. They were dark, the kind of blue an ocean might be described with in the twilight. He had an earnest expression, as if his only desire was to dine with Shouyou. How could he refuse?</p>
<p>“Of course, Tobio,” he said quietly, unsure of how the prince would respond towards his own name. A smile graced him, and for the first time, Shouyou reconsidered whether or not he could fall in love. In the background, there was the softest of sounds, as if a door were shutting close.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>However, whatever barrier they had broken through had been wrapped up with lines and boundaries. Tobio continued to refer to him by his title when there were others around, and even more concerning, when they were alone. They had begun to spend their days in silence, but it wasn’t companionable. Each morning, after breakfast, Tobio would appear at his door and escort him to the library. From there, he would either stay until lunch or disappear to do some princely thing in the castle. After lunch, they would return to the library, finally leave for dinner, sometimes go back to the library after or go straight to dropping Shouyou off at his room. This was their daily schedule for two months.</p>
<p>This was one such day, returning to the library after a hearty dinner. Shouyou glanced up from his book at the other prince, sighing softly when he realized Tobio was asleep in his chair. He lamented the distance between them. He was sure that, after having been so fussed over, Tobio would finally extend a hand to him and they could begin a proper courtship, with romance. As it were, he hardly knew the man any better than when he first arrived. Tobio let his father and brother talk over him during meals and Shouyou didn’t quite feel right addressing any of them too familiarly. If anything, he knew Tobio’s family more than Tobio. The king had been interested in the differences of geography between their two kingdoms, when he was ever present, and Tooru was interested in his opinions on asinine, trivial things. Still, Tobio had failed to make any conversation with him, trivial or not.</p>
<p>He sighed again as he closed his book, instead choosing to stare at the man before him. He always looked so cross when Shouyou was around, but there were times he softened, and would ask him how he felt. He’d wish Tobio wasn’t so awkward around him all the time. They <em>were </em>fiancés. He wondered why they came to the library every day. Of course, he loved reading and he loved books, but wasn’t there more to their relationship than long stretches of silence, punctuated by fingers over paper? Finally deciding to get up and stretch, Shouyou turned to the side, looking at the door. A young woman was there, dressed in a familiar maid’s outfit. She was waving to him rather hurriedly and he walked over.</p>
<p>Before he could ask what was wrong, she spoke. “Please sire, could you wake the prince? Something’s happened, and he needs to come with me quickly.” She spoke gravely. Not for the first time, Shouyou wondered if it was related to the king. He hadn’t seen the man in about a week. But now was not the time for his own musings.</p>
<p>He nodded and turned back around. He walked up to the prince in question and gently shook his shoulder. Tobio awoke with a start before snapping a ‘what’ at him. Shouyou flinched back.</p>
<p>“There’s a maid that said something happened, and she needed you to go with her.” He tried to look apologetic, but in a flash, Tobio was gone. And then, he was alone. The library suddenly felt more silent than he ever thought it would. Would he await Tobio's return? <em>Would </em>he return to collect him? He glanced around at the books, some dark thought coming forth, uninhibited.</p>
<p>Why did he have to stay there? The whole castle would be his new home in just a few weeks, why not explore a little? He had never been told not to. Some deep, adventurous part of him answered the call. He crept over to the door, peeking around the corner of it. No one in sight. He stepped out, and then took another step.</p>
<p>And then another, and another. He was in the middle of the hallway. He looked up one way, and then down the other. Still no one. Without stopping himself, he whooped into the still air. When no one came running to tell him off, he did it again. And then, he started walking down the hall to his left, and soon enough he took off running. It was exhilarating. The sound of his heeled shoes slammed and clicked against the marble floors. He laughed as colors flashed past him, paintings of old little more than a blur.</p>
<p>For once, he felt alive. More than he had since getting to this cursed place. There wasn’t anyone to demurely smile at. There wasn’t anyone to lie about his feelings to. There <em>especially </em>wasn’t anyone he felt he had to hide from. And that was the thing, wasn’t it? Had he really been that close to accepting it? Had he really convinced himself he could love someone he had to hide his true feelings from, all the time? How many more times would he go to wake Tobio, only to get snapped at? How many times would he have to be in harm’s way to get more than a general concern from the man? And his brother! Shouyou felt like a glass figurine around Tooru, like if he moved too much, he’d shatter. But where were they now, as Shouyou gave in to his whims? As he laughed and near hyperventilated with excitement?</p>
<p>He came to a crossroads. Should he go left, down a darkened hallway, or right, towards another darkened hallway? He hummed as he considered both. The best method to choose? Shouyou twirled himself around, letting himself get right and proper dizzy before stumbling forward. He couldn’t even tell which hallway he went down, but it didn’t matter.</p>
<p>A door loomed in front of him, plain and simple. He felt like a heroine, discovering some hidden door to another world. Maybe it’d be better than the one he lived in. Holding his breath, Shouyou placed his palm on the doorknob and turned it.</p>
<p>Maybe he had actually stepped into another world. Moonlight streamed in from the wall on the right, illuminating the room filled with white sheets. The cloth covered every silhouette of furniture, promising intrigue. He walked in, not bothering to close the door. He reached for the first sheet in front of him. What strange and magical artifact laid before him? Ripping the sheet off, he revealed…a music box! He felt himself smile wide. And its key was right there!</p>
<p>Carefully, he slipped the key into its slot and gave it the tiniest of turns. A few notes of a familiar song plinked out. He gasped, realizing he was closer to home than he thought. He gave the key a few more turns, delighting in the song he never imagined would be <em>here </em>of all places. As the music box continued, he investigated more of the room. It appeared to be a studio of some kind. On the wall opposite the door, there was a giant mirror that had long since been abandoned. The sheet hadn’t saved it well from dirt and dust, but Shouyou found its murky surface endearing. A long couch had been revealed from another sheet, its position separating the room into halves. Actually, the second half of the room had wood flooring, almost as if to practice dancing! Gaining a rather genius idea, Shouyou reconsidered the white sheets.</p>
<p>He gathered a few of them and positioned himself in front of the mirror. Using the mirror, he draped the sheets around himself, fashioning an almost hooded robe out of them. He gave it a test spin, seeing if they stayed in place. They did! Giggling to himself, he went back to the music box. Taking hold of the key, he gave it as many turns as he could. He went back to the mirror as he could hear the song start from the beginning. He pretended to put his hand on someone’s shoulder and his other hand out, as if to hold their hand.</p>
<p>He began to dance.</p>
<p>Delirium set upon him. He imagined many things at once. Perhaps he was dancing with Tobio, or Tooru, or any other prince he might dread. Perhaps he <em>had </em>found a magical room and the price of entrance was his staying, forever. Perhaps the music box was cursed and now he would dance until he died. Perhaps he wouldn’t be paying attention and dance right out the door, leaving his body behind, becoming a ghost that danced through the halls at night. Perhaps a creature of the night would glimpse him from the window and fall in love with him. Maybe he’d finally be rescued, like all the heroes of his stories when they get trapped.</p>
<p>He danced and danced and danced. At some point, he abandoned his imaginary partner, content with just moving himself to the music. The song was nearing its climax again, and he began to spin, just as he had when deciding which hall to travel. Suddenly, the song stopped. <em>That’s strange</em>, he thought. Hadn’t he turned the key enough? He stopped spinning, though his head didn’t get the memo. He was facing the mirror. Was that someone else…?</p>
<p>“What’re you doing?” Someone asked dangerously. Shouyou froze, his head finally come to a still. There, in the dirty mirror, was a familiar prince. Turning as slowly as he could, he came to face Prince Tobio, standing in the door way. He opened his mouth, only to close it again. What could he say? The prince had caught him acting so childishly! But why did he look so <em>serious</em>?</p>
<p>Tobio moved forward in the time it took for Shouyou to blink. His wrists were harshly grabbed and pulled.</p>
<p>“I asked,” Tobio pushed into his face, forcing Shouyou to take a half step back. “What are you doing HERE?” His voice rose as he roared. Tears sprung to his eyes and Shouyou was unable to look at him.</p>
<p>“Y-you’re hurting me!” He choked out. Tobio ignored it.</p>
<p>“This is <em>my </em>mother’s study, why are you HERE?” Again, the prince yelled at him. It finally clicked in his head. The queen of Seijoh had passed years ago, the king electing to never remarry. Shouyou briefly remembered his own parents sending a gift of consolation. How could he have forgotten? And what’s more…the king’s absences from every meal. His general pallor the last time Shouyou had seen him. All the times Tobio had disappeared during the day? Had it been…Prince Tobio, who rarely showed his feelings...what could drive him to seeking out his dead mother’s study, that had obviously not been touched in a while?</p>
<p>The King of Seijoh was dead, and Shouyou had been dancing around the dead queen’s private study. As the king lay dying, he’d been disrespecting the memory of the dead queen. No wonder Tobio was looking at him with such disgust.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He babbled out, feeling his throat constrict as his stomach dropped. Tobio wasn’t accepting it. He was shaking him now.</p>
<p>“You think sorry is <em>enough</em>? You’ve been <em>nothing </em>but a burden the entire time you’ve been here and you think sorry is <em>enough</em>?” One of his wrists were let go and Shouyou tried to run, but Tobio held fast onto him. “You think <em>anyone </em>would want to marry you after this?” He was cruel. He was so cruel, and he continued. “I never want to see you again, I want you out of my castle you no good piece of-“</p>
<p>“Tobio!” Someone wrenched Shouyou out of his grasp, but pulled him too close! He was danced away from Tobio, turned to face away from the man. He panicked. Was this someone else to threaten him?</p>
<p>“Let go of me!” He cried out. He struggled, finally looking up. He felt his hood fall away. He met the sad eyes of Prince Tooru. Oh no. Now he’d done it. Both princes found him, galivanting away while their father died. How long did it take? How long did they stay at his bedside until they sought out the memory of their mother to comfort them? How badly had Shouyou screwed up that the crown prince of Seijoh was staring down at him with tears in his eyes?</p>
<p>“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He could only repeat the two words. Finally finding the strength, he broke himself out of Tooru’s light grasp, almost tripping over himself as he ran away, back into the hallway. Back into another hallway. And more and more after that. How would he get back to the library? How would he get back to his room? Did he even deserve to? Did he even deserve a bed after that fiasco? He didn’t have an answer.</p>
<p>He eventually found a hidden alcove and collapsed into it. <em>Tomorrow</em>, he decided as he cried into his hands. <em>Tomorrow, I’ll go call off the engagement</em>.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>uwu Kageyama stans please don't be mad. I did want to thank everyone who has kudos'd and commented, it means a lot that other people like my au! Anyways, I think for sure I'm going to be updating at least every sunday, but classes are about to start for me so that might get pushed back a bit. Anyways, thank you for reading and stay tuned for more!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Apologies to the Wrong Person</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tooru wasn’t looking forward to breakfast that day. He had chased after Shouyou when he ran off the night before but hadn’t found him. It was one thing for Tooru to know how to get around, but it was another trying to track someone who didn’t. Eventually, he’d figured Shouyou had at least found his way back to his room. He stared at himself in his bathroom mirror. Had his face always been so drawn?</p>
<p>He splashed himself with some water and finished getting dressed. An image of Shouyou, wrapped in white with tears staining his face, eyes wide and glistening in the moonlight, flashed through his mind. He could worry about patching things up between Tobio and Shouyou later. First, he had to make sure the prince would even show up to the meal.</p>
<p>With this resolve in mind, Tooru made his way to the dining hall. It wasn’t all that big, just enough to fit five hundred people at once. He’s seen bigger. However, only Tobio was at the table. It wasn’t that strange, Tooru tried to convince himself. Tried to ignore the weird feeling in his stomach at not seeing Shouyou there. Tobio raised a glass to him in greeting as he took his seat.</p>
<p>“Morning,” he said. Even looking down at his breakfast, he felt sick. What was this? Maybe he hadn’t slept enough. He glanced over at Tobio, who looked more passive than Tooru thought he should.</p>
<p>“Have you seen Prince Shouyou today?” He asked casually, forcing some bread down.</p>
<p>“No.” That was it. Tooru’s eyebrow twitched.</p>
<p>“So you haven’t apologized.” It wasn’t really a question.</p>
<p>“There’s nothing to apologize for.” The response came fast. No remorse. Tooru slammed his fist against the table, causing the glassware to shudder.</p>
<p>“Dammit Tobio! He’s your <em>fiancé</em>, if you can’t apologize for last night you will never be happy. And he doesn’t deserve to be treated like that.”</p>
<p>His brother’s voice rose in response. “He disrespected the very crown you’ll be putting on in just days, and you think I should <em>apologize</em>?”</p>
<p>“What did he even <em>do</em>, Tobio?”</p>
<p>Tobio only glared, his lips pressed in a tight line.</p>
<p>“You can’t even tell me?” Tooru glared back. Just as he thought. Tobio was a stubborn mule and he wouldn’t get anywhere just by asking. And Shouyou was still missing from their breakfast.</p>
<p>Tooru sighed to himself, releasing the tight grip he had on his drink.</p>
<p>“Let me ask this decisively, do you have any intention of apologizing, any time soon?”</p>
<p>“No.” Tobio levelled a cool stare at him, as if to dare his brother to say more. Very bold for a little prince, Tooru thought meanly. Instead of chastising his brother anymore, he absently grabbed a free plate and began piling food from the meal on it.</p>
<p>“That’s fine.” He grabbed a couple slices of bacon, hesitating before adding a fourth slice. “Just know that he won’t always wait for you to come to your senses, even if he’s waiting for it now.” With that, Tooru poured out some orange juice into a free glass and grabbed it along with the plate of food. He left the table and made his way out of the dining hall, leaving his younger brother behind.</p>
<p>But maybe, Tooru thought as listened to his footsteps click in the hallways, maybe Shouyou <em>would </em>wait. In very many ways, Tooru didn’t know the man at all. While he could pride himself on having accurately pegged his personality within hours of meeting him, it was a completely different story to guess what the prince would do in this kind of situation. This could be the kind of moment where his true character was revealed. Would he wither away, waiting for Tobio to apologize for something he clearly didn’t seem to regret? Or would he take it in stride, and resolutely ignore every placation Tooru would think of?</p>
<p>Wait. Suddenly, he stopped in the middle of the hallway. Placate him? Of course, as the new king of Seijoh, he had a stake in making sure this engagement went through, yet…was it really up to him to smooth Tobio and Shouyou’s relationship? They didn’t seem to get along very well, and they couldn’t rely on Tooru forever. But…<em>why </em>did he even feel he had to smooth things over? He shifted on his feet as he realized he had just been standing there. He began walking again. Was it a sense of duty for his brother’s love life? Okay, he could literally care less about that on a good day, so probably not. Did he worry about political relations to Karasuno? Perhaps, but there were loveless marriages all the time, and one unhappy prince wouldn’t ruin whatever Seijoh had promised the king. There wasn’t an easy answer, but it could be answered later, he was at Shouyou’s door.</p>
<p>He didn’t knock. The door was slightly ajar, no light coming from the crack. He frowned.</p>
<p>“Prince Shouyou?”</p>
<p><em>One…two…three…</em>no response.</p>
<p>“I brought breakfast.”</p>
<p><em>Four…five…six</em>…again, no response. Sucking in a breath, Tooru slowly stepped forward and pushed the door open, only to find the room completely empty of its occupant. He went to the far side of the room and placed the plate and glass down on the table. Turning around, he noticed a couple things. The bed hadn’t been made and the fireplace hadn’t been lit in a while.</p>
<p>He walked up to the bed first. He lightly pressed his hand to the mattress, then the pillow. Both were cold, which wasn’t a good sign. If anything, it meant Shouyou hadn’t been in the bed for a while, or at the very least, had left it long ago. The fireplace could just not have been used, but given that the room stayed chilled even after being fixed, he doubted Shouyou wouldn’t use it. Perhaps the prince had just woken up early? But then why wouldn’t he go and eat breakfast, or at the very least, come back to his own room? Something about the scene of the empty room sat wrong in his stomach, but there was no reason for him to spend any more time on it.</p>
<p>He went back to the breakfast he left on the table. Most would keep for a while, or at least, until lunch. He grabbed that extra piece of bacon and munched on it. He could leave the food here and send a servant to collect the empty dishes later, preferably replacing them with said lunch. Maybe he would ask them to escort the prince to his study, to explain better what happened last night.</p>
<p>Tooru stopped at the door and took one last look over the room. Prince Shouyou would surely come back to it, wouldn’t he? Feeling unsure of the answer, and uncertain why he cared so much, Tooru left the room entirely, closing the door behind him.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>Lunch came, and went, and Shouyou didn’t show up to the dining hall. Or at least, that’s what Tooru had been told. He ate in his study as his father’s previous advisors walked him though the last few policies his father wanted to enact, and then ended off with the budget for the funeral. In his opinion, his father deserved the least fanciest burial he could get away with, but even that was too much for the man. Still, it was because of this and other reasons he hadn’t been able to pay attention to where Prince Shouyou had gone.</p>
<p>His talks with the former advisors concluded with a release of duty, and ample compensation to last the rest of their lives. They held their tongues, surprisingly, and accepted their retirement gracefully. He was smacked by Hajime as he began talking shit as soon as the last man had left.</p>
<p>“And you’re sure that letting all those advisors go is the best idea?” Hajime asked him, like he hadn’t just assaulted the next king.</p>
<p>“You’re so mean to me,” Tooru whined as he rubbed his arm. “Besides, I wouldn’t do anything I didn’t think would benefit the kingdom.”</p>
<p>“That’s all well and good, but they have much more experience than I do, and now I’m your only advisor.”</p>
<p>“Hajime! Do you doubt your own ability that much?”</p>
<p>“It’s more like I doubt yours.”</p>
<p>Before Tooru could play offended at the statement and casually suggest Hajime had just committed treason, there was a knock at the door. Did one of the former advisors work up the nerve to confront him?</p>
<p>“Come in.”</p>
<p>The door opened and a young butler walked in. He bowed and glanced hesitantly at Tooru before looking back to Hajime.</p>
<p>“It’s fine, I would tell him anyways,” his ‘new’ advisor nodded in his direction.</p>
<p>“Tell me what?” Tooru watched the butler carefully. Was this one of Hajime’s closely guarded spies?</p>
<p>“Of course. My liege, Prince Shouyou has not returned to his room, and the last time he was seen in the castle was last evening, when one of the kitchen staff was passed by a man with his description before disappearing around the corner.”</p>
<p>“What?” Tooru said, just at the same time Hajime said, “Are you sure?”</p>
<p>“Extremely. The kitchen hand couldn’t say for sure what time it was when the Prince supposedly passed her, but we put it at around ten thirty or so.”</p>
<p>“Has,” Tooru interjected. “Has no one seen him at <em>all </em>today?”</p>
<p>“Unfortunately, no.”</p>
<p>“Thank you, go ahead and send someone else to ask around. We’ll handle it from here,” Hajime dismissed. The man nodded sharply, bowed once more, then took his leave. In the man’s wake, Tooru looked at his friend with furrowed brows.</p>
<p>“Tobio asked me to look for him.”</p>
<p>It was simple statement, but it immediately sparked tons of questions. He started with the easiest.</p>
<p>“Tobio?”</p>
<p>“Mhm. Before we met here for the day, Tobio sought me out. He said he had gone to Shouyou’s room and found it empty. He told me what happened last night and that he was worried he had gone ‘too far’. I sent someone to ask around, and the result was what you just heard.”</p>
<p>“But he said no one’s seen him at <em>all</em>, or not since last night. There’s no way he could still be here and <em>not </em>be seen.”</p>
<p>“I agree. I’ll send some of my people to the stables and the neighboring towns.”</p>
<p>“You think he ran away? What all…did Tobio tell you?”</p>
<p>Hajime looked away from him, towards the door, before looking back. “He told me that after his highness passed, he had gone to the late queen’s private studio to collect his thoughts. There, he saw Shouyou imitating the queen and took offense, yelling at him before being separated by you. Then, Shouyou ran off, you chased after and Tobio had stayed in the studio until the early morning.”</p>
<p>Tooru leaned back in his seat, realizing he had been leaning forward while listening. “So that’s why he’d gotten so mad.”</p>
<p>“Tooru?”</p>
<p>“I meant last night. I went there…for more or less the same reason, and I caught the tail end of an argument. When I walked in, Tobio was practically shaking him before I separated them. Mother used to dance around her studio in silly costumes that we would help her with. I suppose that’s what it looked like to Tobio, if that’s what he meant by ‘imitating’.”</p>
<p>“I see,” Hajime said with a tone that indicated how he felt about the situation. Tooru wanted to snort, but the prince was still apparently missing.</p>
<p>“But if even <em>Tobio</em> thought he’d gone too far…enough to ask you to look for Shouyou, perhaps we’re already too late.”</p>
<p>“Well, take a break. I’ll have someone send in some tea. You focus on the budget for the funeral and I’ll handle the missing prince.”</p>
<p>“And if you can’t track him down?”</p>
<p>“Then you’ll have to write a very apologetic letter to Karasuno.”</p>
<p>“Willingly tell them my brother ran their beloved prince off? I hope he hasn’t gotten too far.”</p>
<p>As easy as it was to snicker, Tooru couldn’t deny there was a growing pit in his stomach. Tobio had probably gone to Shouyou’s room after he did. But that just left him with more questions. What exactly had Tobio done, that convinced him Shouyou would want to run away? And where would the prince even go? The surrounding towns wouldn’t recognize the Prince of Karasuno, and even if they did, he wouldn’t be able to prove it other than with his word.</p>
<p>Hours passed. Tea came and cooled, barely touched. Tooru hadn’t been able to think about anything but the missing Prince. Did he really run away? More importantly, was he okay? Was he somewhere warm and safe? Had he eaten at all? Was he resting? Why did it bother him so much?</p>
<p>Deep in thought, Tooru hardly noticed when the sun began to set. He felt restless, and there was a certain energy humming under his skin. He clicked his tongue and decided to go for a walk. Maybe he would find Hajime and get some kind of news. Leaving his study, he had no particular destination in mind. He could go talk with his brother and check in with him. Perhaps he had been a little harsh that morning. While he had his own feelings concerning their father, Tobio had a much better relationship with the man, and whatever the late king had planned for them, Tobio didn’t know anything about it. Maybe Tooru could take it easy on him for the time being.</p>
<p>Suddenly, he was face to face with a door. Somehow, without realizing it, his feet had carried him to Shouyou’s room. He was reminded of that morning when he had first wondered about the prince’s whereabouts. But now, later in the day, the feeling was stronger and more concerning. The door was fully closed, and Tooru felt a little silly when he hesitated knocking on it. He let out a short laugh when there wasn’t a response from the other side. He slowly opened the door to a now familiar sight.</p>
<p>The room was still empty, devoid of its usual occupant. The room itself was bathed in darkness, just the tiniest sliver of deep orange light came through the window. Further investigation revealed that, through the window, the sun set on the far, opposite side of the castle. From this vantage point, Tooru realized how much shorter this tower was compared to the other three. How much sunlight had been denied to the Prince since living here? Shaking himself of this thought, Tooru turned, intent on walking away and going to find Hajime. Instead of seeing the empty room, there was figure draped in white, heavily leaning against the doorway.</p>
<p>“Oh, good,” the figure said softly. “I was worried I wouldn’t find,” the figure paused, “find the room, again.” The person stepped forward, once, twice, swaying dangerously. Without thinking, Tooru surged forward, just in time to catch the person as they fell. He gently pushed the tallest piece of fabric away, revealing a head of familiar orange hair. Prince Shouyou looked up at him with bleary eyes. His cheeks were tear stained, his eyes red and puffy.</p>
<p>“Ah, Prince Tooru…or should I say King? I was…looking for you,” Shouyou gave a shuddering breath here. A hand weakly grabbed his sleeve. “I no longer wish…to hold Prince Tobio to our engagement, and I beg you, release me from it…I just want to go home.” With that, Prince Shouyou’s head fell forward, knocking into Tooru’s chest heavily and the hand on his sleeve fell away. He wasn’t winded by it and instead carefully pushed some of the prince’s hair out of his face. Taking care, he gently wiped the prince’s cheeks of its tears using the same sleeve just in his grasp.</p>
<p>Perhaps it was never Prince Shouyou who had been a bad fit for his brother, but more like, Prince Tobio was a bad match for Shouyou. Perhaps, there was a better option, for everyone involved. Gazing down into Shouyou’s face, Tooru was suddenly cognizant of how <em>relieved </em>he felt to have the prince in his arms, once again.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>“What’ve you and your brother done to the poor kid?”</p>
<p>“Kid? He’s barely younger than Tobio.”</p>
<p>“Not the point. He’s been sleeping poorly for <em>weeks </em>and neither of you noticed? Don’t you eat regular meals with him?”</p>
<p>“We do! But I’ve been busy lately, and it <em>was </em>Tobio’s job to look after him.”</p>
<p>“And I suppose it was also Tobio’s job to <em>blatantly </em>ignore the health of his fiancé?”</p>
<p>The conversation with the court doctor had been…enlightening, to say the very least. Apparently, Prince Shouyou had gotten into a bad sleeping schedule and this led to his eventual collapse in Tooru’s arms. As Ukai, who refused to go by his first name put it, Shouyou had probably wandered around the castle since the evening before, when he parted from the brothers. He likely hadn’t slept or eaten anything since then, which only encouraged a collapse. It was, apparently, a ‘miracle’ he had even made it to his room, given his state.</p>
<p>Tooru had carried him to the only place he could think of, his own room. He had various justifications to give Hajime when his advisor came round with a quirked eyebrow. Given that he had <em>just </em>found the missing prince, who proceeded to collapse, Tooru figured that he should stay with him, in case something more should happen. This is why he bridal carried the younger man around the castle, alerting every servant he could spot to send the doctor to his room. No other reason. Yet Hajime had taken his leave a while ago, to go ‘start the apology to Karasuno’ for him. What an angel, but now Ukai was looking at him.</p>
<p>Ukai leveled a hard stare at him as he was packing his materials. “King Tooru, I’m going to say this from man to man: do not let this continue.” He snapped his bag shut, glancing at the sleeping prince from the corner of his eyes. “He’ll be okay now, but you can’t seriously justify his poor health in your own castle. I seriously doubt he’s been eating enough as well, given the severity of this. If you hadn’t been there, or if he had injured himself falling…I wouldn’t want to be the one to explain that to Karasuno.”</p>
<p>Tooru blinked and swallowed hard. “I understand. Thank you for all your help, I hope I won’t have to rely on it too much.”</p>
<p>With nothing more to say, Ukai nodded, and left. Now alone with a sleeping prince, and his thoughts, Tooru sighed. He sat at the edge of his own bed and watched the gentle rise and fall of Shouyou’s chest. Ukai had left behind a bowl of water and a rag, meant to wipe away some of the dust and dirt that had somehow found its way to the prince’s face. Tooru now grabbed that rag and wringed it out.</p>
<p>He scooted closer to the prince, bringing the rag up and lightly dragging it over his face. Shouyou’s face scrunched, just for the briefest of moments, before it relaxed again. He had read about these kind of actions, once, back when the books he read were more about fictional heroes than tax records. The rag ran across Shouyou’s jaw. He had out grown the need for such childish stories, and almost wanted to smack his own hand for indulging in them. Now, he lightly dragged the rag over his lips, ending back on Shouyou’s cheek. Dimly, he remembered wishing he could recreate such scenes, with someone who <em>meant </em>something to him, and the furthest he ever got was pretending the face in the mirror wasn’t his.</p>
<p>Now, Shouyou’s face scrunched again, and he turned his head to rest his cheek against Tooru’s hand, through the rag. He felt his breath hitch as he watched Shouyou’s eyes flutter open. Whatever light sleep he had gotten seemed to diminish the redness of his eyes, and now they were just the softest shade of pink, closer to white really. His eyes weren’t particularly opened wide, but they settled on Tooru just the same. Tooru himself moved to retract his hand, but it was held in place by one of Shouyou’s. It felt warm.</p>
<p>“Prince Tobio,” he said gently, in a whisper. “I didn’t understand what that place was, not until I realized what had probably happened and why you were there. I cannot excuse my behavior, nor would I seek for you to forgive it, but please understand. That song was one I’ve listened to since childhood and I was feeling homesick. I know you said you never wanted to see me again, and I’m sorry I couldn’t explain then what I do now. I release you from our engagement, and I only wish for you to find someone more suitable, it won’t be hard.” With that, Shouyou fell asleep once more, his hand still against Tooru’s.</p>
<p>Had he really…mistaken Tooru for his brother? His eyes had seemed clear enough, but given the situation, was just tired enough to mistake one brother for the other? And what had he meant by ‘you never wanted to see me again’? Had Tobio really said that to him? Even in this state, Shouyou was still formal and apologized before Tooru could say anything. How could he say Tobio would find anyone better than Shouyou? It would be an impossible task. How could Shouyou apologize for something that wasn’t his fault? And…why wasn’t he pulling his hand away?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So I was kinda stuck on a later chapter and decided to rewrite it and then when I read back through this week's chapter, I decided to write this one as well. Tbh, I think the rewrite kinda helps with my own pacing and I wanted to include more of the early romance development than the original version had. That being said, thank you for reading and stay tuned for more!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. An Engagement Ends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prince Shouyou was beginning to notice a pattern. His throbbing headache urged him to close his eyes once more, but his unfamiliar surroundings forced them to stay open. The room, like the last strange room he woke up in, was also themed white and teal, but that was where the similarities ended. In this room, all the furniture had a sense of being well worn, the exposed wood decidedly less shiny than what he’d seen in Tobio’s room. However, his brain offered up no theories on where he was, and why. The last thing he remembered was having an urgent need to find Tooru and beg for his engagement to be null and voided. Everything after was just a blank.</p><p>As he gazed around the room, he was suddenly aware that he was missing some of his clothes. Lightly pulling back the plush comforter, he found he wore no trousers, and instead wore only a much larger shirt than he was used to. Even now, the sleeves just <em>barely </em>covered his fingers. He stretched his arm out experimentally, slightly in awe at how the shirt seemed to engulf him. His headache forgotten, Shouyou pulled his arm back to himself, just as the door opened.</p><p>Prince Tooru walked in, holding a plate of what seemed to be fruits and vegetables as well as a pitcher. However, the man before him froze, as if shocked by something. Shouyou only blinked in response, before glancing down and remembering he had pulled back the blanket, exposing his bare legs. His face heating to an almost unbearable degree, Prince Shouyou grabbed wildly at the blanket and pulled it over himself completely, curling into a ball underneath. Oh good, he thought to himself, mortified. He was sure both brothers hated him at this point, and now he had more or less flashed the older one. Shouyou felt a weight settle at the foot of the bed.</p><p>It was quiet, then, “How are you feeling?”</p><p>Shouyou winced. Prince Tooru was surely angry at him for having caused so many problems, and yet, he was expressing <em>concern</em>. “I feel fine, thank you.” Why did he care? He’d be sent away soon enough.</p><p>“Good. You worried a lot of people when you disappeared for a whole day. How did you avoid everyone looking for you?”</p><p>He furrowed his brows. “Avoid…?” He murmured.</p><p>“I’m sorry? I couldn’t hear you…through the blanket.”</p><p>Taking a deep breath, Shouyou peeked over the edge of said blanket. He made eye contact with the prince and half wanted to hide again. Tooru’s gaze was oddly intense, and there was a contemplative glimmer in them.</p><p>“I wasn’t avoiding anyone. I was…looking for someone, to take me to <em>you</em>.”</p><p>Tooru’s eyes widen, losing their intensity. “Me?”</p><p>“I didn’t know…where you stayed during the day. I needed someone to escort me to you, but no matter where I looked, I couldn’t find anyone.”</p><p>“So you <em>weren’t </em>hiding? Where did you even go?”</p><p>“I just walked,” Shouyou shifted to sit up, letting the blanket pool in his lap. “I wasn’t sure how to get anywhere and I figured that if I just walked long enough, I could find someone.”</p><p>“But then how did you get to your room?”</p><p>Shouyou shrugged. “I didn’t know it was my room until I walked in. The area began to feel familiar, but I think I came in a different direction than I’m used to.” He squirmed as Tooru studied him. Finally, the man looked away. Tooru then stretched from his spot on the bed, pulling the plate of food off from a nightstand Shouyou hadn’t noticed.</p><p>“I’m sure you must be hungry by this point.”</p><p>“Oh no, please don’t worry about me I-“ His stomach growled, loudly. Tooru turned slowly to him, hands carefully balancing the plate.</p><p>“Why do you keep doing that?”</p><p>“Doing what?”</p><p>“You keep pretending you’re okay and in want for nothing, but then you go and get sick, or you sleep so little you collapse after a day of walking. Why do you keep ignoring your own needs?”</p><p>Shouyou was, to put it lightly, taken aback. He couldn’t hold eye contact for very long and was forced to look down at his hands. “I’d hoped no one would notice.”</p><p>“<em>Why</em>?”</p><p>“I…don’t know.” It was the truth, as far as he was concerned. The bed he was given to sleep on wasn’t terrible, but it seemed that no matter which direction he faced or what side he laid on, he just couldn’t sleep. But as for why he never mentioned any discomfort…</p><p>“I’m used to putting my own needs, as you called them, aside. My brothers are more likely to complain about something before I do, and I’ve spent a long time covering for their behavior. I suppose I just…haven’t stopped.”</p><p>“I see. Well, neither of them are here, and you’re still hungry.” With that, Tooru offered him the plate. Shouyou accepted it gratefully and finally looked at its contents. There was actually a small bowl of rice, steaming hot, and a couple uncracked eggs softly cradled by a mound of hash-browns. Shouyou looked up sharply when he realized what he was looking at.</p><p>“This is-?”</p><p>“Egg rice.” Tooru gave him, possibly, the softest smile he had ever seen from the prince. The corners of his eyes crinkled, even from the small expression he made. Something in Shouyou’s heart felt warm and turned back to his food to escape it, yet Tooru was speaking again. “I know it’s probably not what you’re used to, but Hajime said this was the most popular dish in Karasuno.”</p><p>Shouyou’s gaze had involuntarily slid back up to the prince. “Thank you,” he said honestly. It <em>had </em>been months since he’d had his own country’s dishes, and the sudden wave of homesickness drove him to picking up an egg and cracking it into the bowl of rice. He accidentally stuck his pinky finger into the rice and hissed as he pulled it from the meal.</p><p>“Are you okay? Hajime said the rice had to be really hot, but I wasn’t sure <em>how </em>hot, and I didn’t know if you would wake up before it cooled.”</p><p>“It surprised me more than it hurt me.” He stuck the tip of the wounded finger into his mouth and sucked at it. Once he determined it was fine, he took his finger away and looked for a utensil to stir the offending rice. A fork had entered his line of vision at some point and he grabbed it. When he looked up to thank Tooru, he found the prince apparently speechless, a pink blush across his cheeks and nose.</p><p>“Are you okay, Tooru?” His question seemed to snap the man out of whatever had distracted him. Tooru relinquished the fork and cleared his throat.</p><p>“I’ve been…made aware you wish to end your engagement to Tobio,” the other prince said just as Shouyou punctured the yolk. He paused.</p><p>“It’s not so much end as…release,” he said slowly, stirring the mixture of rise and yolk.</p><p>“Is that not the same thing?”</p><p>“Not to me.” He didn’t explain it further. Whatever atmosphere had existed between them, dissipated. Tooru was no longer smiling and his blush had faded.</p><p>“Whatever the difference, why?”</p><p>Shouyou had mixed the bowl to his satisfaction and silently wished he had some seaweed. “I know it’s not my place, to make such a demand, but I’m surprised you even have to ask.”</p><p>“Oh? I’m not sure I understand.”</p><p>“You…saw me, the same way Tobio did, didn’t you?” He hated how his voice went soft. He petulantly stuck some rice into his mouth and chewed. The two of them fell silent, leaving Shouyou floundering mentally. Was this just another mistake? Tooru had already been more than generous in his concern and care for him, but had Shouyou just reminded him of how much he didn’t deserve it?</p><p>“Exactly,” Tooru said softly after a moment. “Exactly how do you think I see you?”</p><p>In many ways, Shouyou was hesitant to say. In just that moment, he remembered that he wasn’t just talking to Prince Tooru, but now he was talking to <em>King </em>Tooru, in everything but title. That’s all this came to, didn’t it? All Tooru’s concern wasn’t really his, it was his role as Seijoh’s king. Something cold settled in his stomach, and something bitter stayed on his tongue. Perhaps Tooru had asked him such a question to <em>remind </em>him of his place. Shouyou couldn’t bring himself to look at the man.</p><p>“I’m just the second prince of Karasuno, meant to be married to your younger brother. I have no more value than that.” It was the truth, as much as he tried to ignore it these last two months. He wished he could ignore the look Tooru was giving him.</p><p>“I’m not sure what I could say to that, but I <em>am </em>open to ending your engagement to Tobio.”</p><p>“You are?”</p><p>Tooru scrunched his nose like he’d wanted to snort, but didn’t. “I’m not a monster, Shouyou, I can see you’re not happy with him and I won’t force you to marry him.”</p><p>Shouyou didn’t know what to do with the information. How could his own feelings be so indecipherable? He could recognize relief, but he also noticed a sense of defeat, and yet, there was a myriad of other emotions he couldn’t identify. There was a particular heaviness that settled in his chest, and he didn’t know what it could be. There was little he could say in response.</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>“That is to say, engagements aren’t canceled very often, and my father took with him a lot of secrets. Even now, I don’t know all that he promised your father, so I’ll have to renegotiate whatever they agreed on,” Tooru warned. Shouyou nodded along, but the news wasn’t all that surprising. Really, all Shouyou heard from that was he gets to go home.</p><p>“Truly, Prince Tooru, thank you.” Shouyou returned his full attention to his rapidly cooling meal. He hardly noticed the way Tooru watched him.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Of course, Shouyou should’ve known it wasn’t even <em>that </em>easy to say the engagement was null and voided. Certain political actions had to be dealt with first, namely, Tooru’s coronation. Tooru had invited him to the party afterwards, but he hadn’t felt up to joining the festivities. None of the nobility invited would have known about his engagement to Prince Tobio, but he didn’t discredit their ability to gossip. Instead, he stayed within his room, three days after he woke up in (as he’d been told later) Tooru’s bed.</p><p>In an almost cruel twist of fate, Shouyou watched the festivities from his window, gazing down into the courtyard of glittering, shifting colors. In the middle of it all was the newly crowned King Tooru, who commanded the gazes of the partygoers with just a simple gesture, or at least, what Shouyou assumed was a simple gesture. His view was rather skewed from his perch.</p><p>He watched the party below, almost in awe as the colorful figures shifted between each other. A group in deep red paid their respects to the new king while a pair in stark white seemed to look on. There was a conspicuous mingling of oranges of varying shades and purple was dotted through the crowd. He sighed as he imagined what it might be like to be down there.</p><p>Perhaps, so far from home and so far from anyone who knew him, he would become a different person. He imagined he was down there, sipping on wine he didn’t like and barely tolerating the nobility who tried to kiss up to him. He imagined that he would subtly roll his eyes, only to meet the gaze of an attractive stranger. Then he’d dance the night away, and forget the way he avoided looking at Tobio. Or maybe, he would tire of the party early, and when he stepped away to catch a breath, he would be kidnapped! For ransom! And he would be spirited away, dramatically claiming he’d rather die than be used for such cheap gains. And then his captor, an inexplicably attractive man, would ask him what he thought his value was, and Shouyou would admit he didn’t think of himself as very valuable, and then the captor would take him on a journey. He’d renounce his claim to royalty and become a traveler, learning skills he’d never thought existed and his former captor, turned lover, would show him that it was never his title that gave him value, it was himself.</p><p>He sighed, just as he heard a loud BOOM. Bright blue light flashed over the party before quickly fading. Another boom, another flash of color, this time a bright green. The crowd began clapping. It had been what he needed to break out of his imagination, and he sorely wished he could immerse himself back into it, but he couldn’t. Somehow, the coordinated clapping had only served to remind him how far away he truly was from everything going on. No one below, save the two brothers, knew he was there, and he was sure that neither one of <em>them </em>would particularly care if he vanished.</p><p>He ripped his gaze away from the party, and casted it angrily over his room. That was true, wasn’t it? He could up and walk away, and not be missed by a single person in Seijoh. He stood up, pulling his black shawl around him tighter. He ignored the ache behind his eyes and stalked to the door, slamming it open, but couldn’t take a step further. A surge of fear shot through him. The last time he’d decided to take matters into his own hands, it resulted in him ending his own engagement. If he stormed out now, what room would he end up in? What state would the princes find him in? Would the little patience they had finally run out?</p><p>Shouyou leaned heavily against the doorway, finally giving in to the pain behind his eyes. Hot tears streamed down his face and he sobbed as he was aware of another boom behind him. He pulled himself away from the opened door and dragged himself back to the window. What was he looking for? The crowd below had blurred in his foggy vision. The colors that had so entranced him now made his vision swim. Perhaps he wasn’t looking for anyone.</p><p>In a moment of clarity, his vision cleared and there was a brief pause between his sobs. He had expected that every head would be turned away from his tower, towards the fireworks that had been coloring the sky. As he looked down into the courtyard, into the world he was sure he would never be missed from, he was starkly aware that the new King was the only person who had turned his face to Shouyou’s tower.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The next day, Shouyou cracked open his eyes and winced as he sat up. At some point during the night, he had fallen asleep at the table next to his window. His neck had rested at a weird angle during his sleep, and he could feel the pain of it as he attempted to stretch it out. Something fell off of him. He blinked and carefully careened his head towards the floor beside him. One of the blankets from his bed was now bunched on the floor. He didn’t remember grabbing it at any point last night, but it wasn’t out of the question.</p><p>Disregarding the blanket, Shouyou got up, stretching out his aching muscles. He meandered to his bathroom and set about freshening himself up. Tooru had promised that they would leave the day after his coronation, and he didn’t want to go back home looking a mess.</p><p>He avoided looking at the mirror until he was <em>just </em>done with taking a bath, and he wished he hadn’t. Dark circles had formed underneath his eyes and there was a slightly hollowed look to his cheeks. He attempted a smile, only to stretch his surprisingly chapped lips thin. Part of his lip split, and he hissed as blood welled up on it. There was probably no amount of ‘freshening’ he could do to cover up his appearance. It had been a while since he particularly used any of the beauty products he had brought with him and he struggled to remember which ceramic pot was the lip tonic. Finally, he found it and scooped up some of the opaque jelly. Using his finger and the mirror, he gently swiped the jelly across his lip, careful to dab it over the spot that had split open.</p><p>The reflection staring back at him seemed no better than moments before. He sighed, closing his eyes, and turning away from the mirror entirely. It was useless to continue worrying about it, especially since there was nothing else he could do. He left the bathroom and entered his room once more. He dragged himself to the closet and barely noticed which clothes he threw on. He’d wanted to put more effort into the way he looked, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to do so. He sighed, setting to work pulling his clothes together, folding them neatly on top of his bed.</p><p>Shouyou lifted up a shirt and frowned, folding the sleeves into the torso and folding the garment in half. Tooru had told him not to worry about packing his things, as he would send servants to do it for him, but Shouyou didn’t want his last interaction with the castle to be people doing something he could do himself. Besides, he was confused by the whole thing. He was meant to leave the castle after breakfast, and yet none of his things were packed? He shook his head, placing the final piece of clothing onto his bed. He took a step away and gazed around the room he’d lived in for the last few weeks.</p><p>There was some kind of foreboding feeling in him as his eyes naturally landed on the window across the room. The weight of his decision finally settled on him. His engagement hadn’t really just been his own, it had also been between their kingdoms. What had he denied his people by this failure? Trying not to feel like he was running away from something, he opened the door, and looked up and down the hall. No one stood waiting to escort him. Disappointment filled him and he stood there in shock. It was the first time in a while that Tobio <em>hadn’t</em> been on the other side of his door, and Shouyou was left wondering why it bothered him.</p><p>“He doesn’t care, he doesn’t care,” he said out loud, into the empty air. He felt his eyes widen and he clapped a hand over his mouth. A particular image floated to the front of his mind. There was a day that Shouyou had woken up much earlier than usual, or more accurately, had slept fitfully and decided to abandon the pursuit of sleep. He had gotten dressed and decided to wear something a little fancier that day. When the awaited knock sounded at his door, he remembered a distinct anticipation before he opened the door. The image that floated to his head now was the stunned expression Tobio had made, a light flush across his cheeks.</p><p>Staring into the empty hallway, Shouyou understood he was at an emotional impasse. Had he been too hasty? Assumed too much of Tobio? His recollection of the night the former king passed was becoming hazy, but he could distinctly remember the utter <em>disgust </em>Tobio had given him. It had to have been a mistake, a misunderstanding, right? He stood still, hoping there would be a familiar set of footsteps, just down the hall, but as he strained his ears, he was met with silence.</p><p>He heard himself take a shuddering breath and forced himself to move. His mind went blank as he walked, finally finding himself at the dining hall. Would Tobio work up the courage to face him? Would Shouyou? He walked past the opened doors, eyes honing in on the dining table.</p><p>“Good morning, Shouyou,” King Tooru smiled at him, raising a steaming teacup in greeting.</p><p>He mustered the best smile he could give but said nothing as he made his way to his chair. Tooru watched him carefully, the smile slipping from his face. His eyes narrowed and there was an obvious clench in his jaw.</p><p>“Did you sleep at all last night?”</p><p>Shouyou could lie, say he had slept and that his dark circles was from something else. He could tell a white lie and say he had been excited to leave, to finally go home. However, in the time it had taken for Shouyou to figure out how he should respond, Tooru’s gaze had intensified. Whatever Shouyou would say, Tooru would be able to see right through it.</p><p>“I didn’t.” All that thinking, and he told the truth anyways. Tooru made a little hmm.</p><p>“I’ll ask someone to look at your bed, it’s an older room after all.”</p><p>Shouyou frowned. “I’m not going to be using it anymore.”</p><p>Tooru froze, the teacup he was holding frozen just at his lip. “Ah,” he took a sip, and set the cup down. “The room might be used again in the future, it wouldn’t do good to keep a bad mattress.” He wasn’t looking at Shouyou anymore, focused decidedly on his plate of food.</p><p>Yet another odd statement, but Shouyou was too tired, suddenly, to think about it. Instead, he piled food onto his own plate. Someone nudged a teacup in front of him, and poured a deep brown liquid inside. He looked up, catching Tooru’s eyes.</p><p>“It’s not tea, but it’ll help wake you up better,” he took a sip of his own cup. “If it’s too bitter, you can add milk and sugar to it.”</p><p>“…thank you,” he said simply as he picked up the cup. Bringing it to his lips, he slightly parted them and took a hesitant sip. Instantly, the temperature of the drink and the bitterness overwhelmed him. He had half the mind to drop the cup and start coughing, but he held onto it. Within his vision, a small saucer dish of sugar cubes and a tiny pitcher of milk scooted next to his plate. Setting his cup down, he placed approximately three cubes of sugar in and practically poured out half the pitcher of milk into the drink. He stirred it with a spoon and attempted another sip. It was still borderline bitter, but acceptable.</p><p>“How can you drink this stuff?”</p><p>“I don’t, not often. I only request the stuff when it’s one of <em>those </em>days.”</p><p>“Oh.” Had Tooru guessed he wouldn’t be able to sleep? He said nothing more, and Tooru seemed perfectly content with leaving their conversation at that. As Shouyou began to eat, the pair of them fell silent. Not that he particularly minded. There wasn’t much he could think of saying to the man, and he definitely didn’t want to talk about his feelings for Tobio. So, they didn’t talk, and he didn’t mind it. Not at all. It was in silence that their meal passed, and it was in silence that they finished, got up together, and began to walk away.</p><p>They walked, side by side, or more accurately, Tooru was just a step ahead, gently guiding him through the halls. Soon enough, they ended up at the main entrance. Leaving the giant doors and walking down the steps reminded Shouyou of the first day he had arrived at the castle. He remembered how hopeful he had been before it got quashed by being casually insulted. Tobio <em>had </em>apologized for that, but still. Now, the second time he was seeing these steps, he was leaving them.</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>Shouyou blinked, realizing he had stopped at the top of the steps. He tried to smile reassuringly, but he wasn’t sure he had been too convincing.</p><p>“I will be,” he said noncommittally as he walked down the steps, passing Tooru. The carriage before them, on the road, was rather small, perfect for just two people. He came up to it, beginning his ascent into it. However, his foot slipped off the step for the carriage, and his grip on the door loosened in surprise. He began to fall backwards, and accepted his fate.</p><p>A warm arm wrapped around his waist, a hand gripping his side protectively. He was shifted, pulled more like, into a broad chest. Shouyou’s hand rested against it, and he could feel the telltale sign of thick muscles underneath fabric. He glanced up, and the thank you on his tongue died.</p><p>Tooru was looking at him with soft eyes, his face passive and peaceful. In the morning light, the golden sunrise casted a warm glow over his face, and lightened his hair considerably. From Shouyou’s perspective, it was like a halo had descended upon Tooru, who was still holding him tightly to his chest. Something moved erratically under his fingertips, and without thinking, he pressed into the skin. Tooru coughed and finally released him.</p><p>“You should be more careful,” he said, yet there was strange gravelly quality to his voice.</p><p>“Thank you,” Shouyou said, but he hardly paid attention to what Tooru looked like. He was too busy staring at his fingertips.</p><p>Another hand grasped his fingers and tugged him back to the carriage. He was more or less ushered into the carriage, blinking away the image of the castle through the window as the carriage suddenly started. He looked in front of him, noticing that Tooru had settled heavily into his seat opposite him, pointedly looking away from him. There was a particular mood in the air between them and Shouyou was hesitant to puncture it. He sighed softly and decided to close his eyes instead, sleepiness overtaking him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay I'm not sure if y'all can tell or not but I started running out of steam towards the end. I wasn't going to rewrite this chapter but I ended up doing it anyways because I felt it could be better than the og version. That being said, I definitely do have more in store for them and I can't wait for y'all to see what's really been going on in the story. As always, thank you for reading and tune in for more next week!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. A Change in Plans</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>King Tooru liked to think he was in his element, watching Shouyou’s father sputter before him.</p>
<p>“Your majesty, I cannot understand your motives for this-“</p>
<p>“And you don’t need to,” Tooru cut the older man off smoothly. The man narrowed his eyes, seemingly coming back to himself. Tooru continued.</p>
<p>“Think about my offer. It’s exactly as my father planned it, only now the other name on the deed is different. You will get your resources and your support to reclaim your lost lands. Why the hesitation?” He leaned back in his chair. While it was uncomfortable with its old cushions, Tooru made sure he gave no indication of it. The office was older, and from the appearance of the furniture, hadn’t been updated in a great many years.</p>
<p>This was what he enjoyed, greatly. Many underestimated his diplomatic skills, assumed he was nothing more than a frivolous prince, and he used that to his advantage. It was underestimation that had driven a rift between him and his father, and it would underestimation that dropped everything he wanted into his lap. The carriage ride that had led him to this moment was silent, filled only with the sound of Shouyou’s gentle and even breathing as he slept. He wanted to tell the prince what he was <em>really </em>doing, but he couldn’t bring himself to disturb his sleep, and when they finally arrived at the castle, Shouyou’s brothers whisked him away, leaving Tooru with no chance to fill him in. It was no matter though, the result would be the same by the end of this conversation.</p>
<p>“You misunderstand me, King Tooru. Your father had promised me Shouyou would be the answer to our problems, just as you have, but I don’t see why <em>you</em> would want him instead. Your brother fits the bill just as well.”</p>
<p>Tooru raised an eyebrow. “You would willingly marry your son off to someone who doesn’t love him?” Tooru wasn’t an idiot. If there was anything he and Tobio had in common, it was their pride. Shouyou had injured Tobio’s by being too good for him and Tobio would never forgive himself for his own behavior. Could Shouyou’s father not understand his concerns about the match? But now wasn’t the time to worry about that, the king was speaking.</p>
<p>“And you do?”</p>
<p>What a question! Tooru took a sharp intake, before leveling a cool stare at the man. He had asked himself that very question the whole way here, openly watching the prince as he slept. Marriage was a question Tooru never had to ask. As the official crown prince, Tooru was never want for a lack of suitors. He remembered a time that even Prince Ushikawa had made him an offer, though that would’ve been the price of his crown. But Shouyou? A little prince from a once great kingdom? Never mind Tooru’s own ideas about marriage, he was just taking away Shouyou’s option for it.</p>
<p>“Even if I did, you have no issue with Tobio not loving him, why am I any different?”</p>
<p>The king’s eyebrows furrowed like he was asked a ridiculously obvious question. “Shouyou can’t provide you an heir.”</p>
<p>“Is that your only objection? His inability to have my children?”</p>
<p>“You know what I mean. It <em>is </em>one thing to hand my son over to be the prince of another kingdom, and it’s another to hand my son over to be <em>your </em>husband. I can’t help but feel like you’re mocking me, King Tooru.”</p>
<p>“Now, you misunderstand <em>me</em>. I have my own plans concerning heirs, and I want Shouyou to be a part of that, at my side. I cannot promise I’ll love him, but I can promise all that my father did and more. I know that both your other sons are unmarried and that at least your eldest has someone who is interested. How much more interested would they be if one of the other sons was a <em>king</em>?”</p>
<p>The pair of them fell silent as they stared at each other. They both knew Shouyou was a piece to be moved between them, and Tooru hated himself for it. It wasn’t fair to him at all, but Tooru wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted Shouyou by his side. For all his dramatic tendencies and lethal modesty, Shouyou was perfect to keep close by. He’d seen exactly what his father had, and he’d be damned if he let the opportunity go.</p>
<p>“It seems there’s nothing for me to oppose. But will you tell him, or will I?”</p>
<p>“I will. He’s my fiancé now, after all. After lunch, I’ll tell him at his room and then the both of us will leave.”</p>
<p>“So soon?”</p>
<p>“I’d rather not stick around for your other sons to murder me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>Scheming made him mean. Tooru had always understood that about himself. There was something about the art of subtle negotiations that put him on edge, and the result was <em>always </em>someone curt and sharp. Despite his claim to the king, he’d skipped lunch and headed straight for Shouyou’s room. It wouldn’t do any good to speak with him when he was so wound up like this. Perhaps he would calm down if he familiarized himself with his new fiancé.</p>
<p>Hmm. He paused to thank the servant who had shown him the way and now stood staring at the door. For the last two months, he had exclusively considered Shouyou as <em>Tobio’s </em>husband-to-be, and now he was Tooru’s. He understood, on some level, that what he was doing was underhanded and conniving, but he also couldn’t bring himself to feel bad about it. Tobio had screwed up and left an opening for Tooru to take advantage of, especially in the wake of their father’s death. He would never hand over Shouyou to his brother, and, with a start, realized he couldn’t hand Shouyou over to anyone else.</p>
<p>Lightly shaking his head, he opened the door and stepped inside the room of a prince. Light poured in from the far window, illuminating the room with such clarity of the afternoon sun that Tooru couldn’t help but squint in its brilliance. When his eyes finally adjusted, he fully stepped in and closed the door behind himself, taking in the room fully. In some respects, it was nothing like the room Shouyou had been given in his castle. Instead, the bed here was fully decorated with mismatched pillows and black and orange sheets and curtains. A long couch was at the end of it, finely crafted with black velvet. The walls were covered with various shelves of knick-knacks and trinkets, a testament to the person who’d lived there. Across the room, there was a small table and matching chair pressed against the wall, the chair a perfect height for viewing the outside. Tooru felt compelled to walk over to it, noticing thin rings of past tea cups stained unto the wooden surface of the table.</p>
<p>Looking up out the window, Tooru was startled to see clearly into a courtyard below. He was reminded of the night of his coronation when he had looked up to see Shouyou staring down at everyone. He had looked beautiful then, like some ghost trapped in a glass box…<em>beautiful</em>? He blinked as the adjective came out from nowhere. Yes, sure, Shouyou was attractive, but <em>beautiful</em>? A familiar feeling settled in his chest. When had he felt this last? Oh, of course, when he had carried Shouyou, then again, when he had accidentally witnessed Tobio’s apology. And that time Shouyou had fallen into his arms, or when Shouyou had apologized to him in a haze, thinking he was Tobio. Wait, he didn’t even remember <em>noticing </em>the feeling, but as he thought back to those unconnected events, two things tied them together: this feeling and its proximity to Shouyou. He shifted in his place, suddenly wishing he were anyone else. Had he…? No, no, it was impossible. There was no way he fell in love with Prince Shouyou, was there?</p>
<p>“King Tooru?” A voice called to him, breaking him from his thoughts. He stepped away from the window and turned. The sun was now casting a golden light through the window, making Shouyou before him glow with warmth. Shit.</p>
<p>“I had to speak with you, urgently,” he said before his thoughts could spiral. Shouyou nodded shyly and indicated he could sit in the chair next to him. He didn’t take it.</p>
<p>“I know I told you I was here just to speak with your father about the agreement he made with mine, but that’s not the whole reason.” He paused. Shouyou only stared, something of recognition going across his face. He continued. “Our fathers had agreed to your and Tobio’s union in order to regain what Karasuno lost. I assume you knew that much? However, I don’t intend on letting that agreement go.”</p>
<p>Finally, Shouyou started to show emotion. His face contorted with confusion. “But you said…I wouldn’t have to marry Tobio.”</p>
<p>“And you won’t.”</p>
<p>“So how can the agreement still be…<em>no</em>.” Shouyou turned away from him. Tooru hadn’t expected such an anguished sound. There, in the corner where Tooru hadn’t looked before, was a floor length mirror. Shouyou’s face was etched clearly in the reflection, myriads of emotions flowing through it.</p>
<p>“<em>Why</em>?” The prince asked. It sounded strained, like he was holding something back. He was hugging himself tightly. Tooru half wanted to step forward and do it for him.</p>
<p>“You wouldn’t understand.”</p>
<p>Shouyou whirled around, a fire in his eyes. “<em>Try </em>me.”</p>
<p>Tooru narrowed his own. “My father, days before he died, told me he had planned to name Tobio king instead.”</p>
<p>“But you’re the first born?”</p>
<p>“My father was a great many things, but a good king wasn’t one of them. He wasn’t like you, who cares for the poorest of your people. He enjoyed luxury and money too much. It got worse after my mother died, when there was no one to temper his greediness. He didn’t like that I disagreed with him on policy and that I had promised to change them when my time came.”</p>
<p>A dawning of understanding came onto Shouyou’s face. “So he was going to give it to your brother instead. But what does that have anything to do with me? It doesn’t make sense to make me a king’s husband.”</p>
<p>Tooru took a deep breath before responding. “It does. His plan needed someone who could help keep Tobio in line with his own ideas on how Seijoh should be ruled. His plan would also need someone already <em>with </em>Tobio so no other kingdom would take advantage of a young king.”</p>
<p>Now, there was a look of disgust on Shouyou’s face. “That’s exactly what you’re doing now, isn’t it?”</p>
<p>He didn’t respond.</p>
<p>“You…you were supposed to <em>release </em>me!” Shouyou’s voice was raising. “You were <em>supposed </em>to set me free!”</p>
<p>He deserved this.</p>
<p>“<em>Why </em>me? What even <em>am </em>I to you? Just another pawn to move on a board? Does what I want mean <em>nothing </em>to <em>no one</em>?”</p>
<p>“It’s not you,” he said uselessly.</p>
<p>“But it <em>is</em>. I knew it, all along, I didn’t know, not for sure, but I did. I <em>knew </em>there was something wrong with it. What could the great and mighty Seijoh get from a union with Karasuno? I should’ve known it was just empty politics, that’s all kings are good for.”</p>
<p>Tooru bristled at the jab. “I <em>love </em>my country and-“</p>
<p>“Every king <em>loves </em>his country,” Shouyou spat. “The only two kings <em>I </em>know love their countries so much, they would take away any hope I had of a happy future.”</p>
<p>“And what did you even think that would be, huh? A happy future? You’re a goddamn <em>prince </em>what other future did you have that was <em>happy</em>? Life isn’t a novel!”</p>
<p>“I never asked it to be! I never asked to be a prince! I won’t stand here and thank you for being such a good <em>husband </em>to me! All this time, did you even consider my feelings? Did you ever wonder what I thought?”</p>
<p>Shouyou boldly stepped forward, the fists at his sides shaking. “Did you, even for one minute, consider how I would feel? How horrible it is to know that my only worth is what I could offer you, or Tobio, or our fathers? Both my brothers have met people they could love, no, that they <em>do </em>love, but what do I have? A king who stole me from his brother to use <em>exactly </em>the way his father would have?”</p>
<p>“What do you mean <em>stole</em>? You collapsed into my arms and asked me to annul your engagement to him.” The prince’s face went bright red at that and Tooru’s heart dropped. “Don’t tell me, did you…<em>actually </em>fall in love with Tobio? Even after…?” He asked softly.</p>
<p>“I don’t know!” Shouyou cried helplessly, hiding his face into his hands. “But it doesn’t matter, does it?” He looked up. “I won’t ever know if we could have reconciled and had that happy future you so clearly don’t believe in. But tell me, Tooru, do you even <em>like </em>me?”</p>
<p>Tooru’s immediate answer was no. Despite whatever feelings he had developed for the prince, he could feel that he didn’t particularly <em>like </em>Shouyou. Shouyou was too quiet and meek and spineless. He was too romantic and dramatic and wasn’t anything a prince should be like. He was juvenile in his approach to his courtship with Tobio and expected a great romance to come of it. He was so modest and formal he put his health at risk multiple times just to avoid any kind of confrontation. Tooru wanted Shouyou at his side because of these qualities. Tooru would get to reign while Shouyou ensured he wouldn’t have to fight anyone off, but none of this meant he particularly<em> liked </em>Shouyou.</p>
<p>“I’m not just a moron, you know.” Shouyou’s voice was quiet. “I don’t just dream about what-ifs all day. I’ve known, all my life, that one day I would be used like this, like a good to be sold, or I guess, more like I was the payment. I’ve known that one day, I would wake up and never see my brothers again. I was beginning to accept a future with Tobio, even if it <em>wasn’t</em> like my novels and I lamented what could have been had I not offended him so badly. I can tell you don’t like me, just as your brother doesn’t and your father probably didn’t. Am I to forever be disliked? Will I stay just as disliked as your husband, as I would have as Tobio’s?” Shouyou was finally crying. Tooru dimly realized he’d been waiting for it.</p>
<p>“I would rather you tell me how much you hate me now, than let me hope all my life if you could <em>love </em>me.”</p>
<p>There was a question being asked here that Tooru wished he could answer. It would be so easy, just to tell Shouyou that while he didn’t like him, he <em>could </em>love him, as he was already growing to do. But that wouldn’t be what he wanted to hear. It wouldn’t free him from his burdens, or his role in life.</p>
<p>Shouyou finally stepped into his personal space, resting his head just below Tooru’s chin. A fist weakly connected with his chest.</p>
<p>“<em>Tell me</em>.”</p>
<p>Tooru wrapped his arms around Shouyou, the first time he’s done so without the prince being sick or otherwise compromised. A tear finally rolled down his face.</p>
<p>“I <em>can’t</em>.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry if this chapter is a little shorter than normal, I just really wanted to leave the focus on their argument at the end. Next week's chapter should make up the difference, so look forward to that! Otherwise, thank you for reading and tune in for more!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Aftermath Of His Decisions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Prince Shouyou was not often angry. He was not often moved to such lengths of arguing with a king, and yet Tooru brought that out of him easily. The tears streaming down his face were from anger, and nothing else. How could Tooru do this to him? How could he have promised to free him, only to ensnare him in a different trap? How <em>dare </em>he pity Shouyou for the situation Tooru engineered?</p>
<p>And that’s what it all was, wasn’t it? ‘I can’t’ can mean a lot of things, to a lot of people. To Shouyou, it was obviously pity. Tooru doesn’t hate him, at least he’s certain of that much, but ‘I can’t’ means Tooru was confirming he couldn’t love Shouyou. Who would, honestly? What did he provide in a relationship? He had never had one before and yet he had the audacity to expect one to materialize out of thin air? It was no wonder Tobio hated him and Tooru pitied him.</p>
<p>“You’re cruel, King Tooru,” he whispered into the king’s chest.</p>
<p>“I know,” was the whispered reply.</p>
<p>How pathetic of him. Even in all his anger, Shouyou understood he was still weak. Weak enough to accept that Tooru was still holding him, even after they had collapsed to the floor together. Weak enough to not even attempt to pull away. Weak enough to tug on Tooru’s shirt when the older man pulled away from him.</p>
<p>“Why did you tell me my things would be packed, if I was just going to stay with you anyways?”</p>
<p>“It would make it easier to move rooms. Not into mine, of course, but one near it,” Tooru added quickly.</p>
<p>“Let me rephrase, why did you let me <em>think </em>I could go home, and stay here?”</p>
<p>There wasn’t a reply this time. Instead, Tooru disentangled himself and stood up. He offered a hand to help Shouyou do the same but retracted it as Shouyou made no move to accept it.</p>
<p>“I’ll go get the carriage readied. Meet me at the entrance when you’re done,” and with that, the king swept past him, opened, and closed the door. The silence that followed was deafening. Shouyou’s heart grew heavy as he realized he was silently sobbing. He could not wail and as his tears sprang forth, renewed in vigor by Tooru’s departure, he found that any attempt to make a sound was blocked by his own throat.</p>
<p>Through his tears, he looked around the room he had once called home. The blurry images of his bed and sofa and even his mirror greeted him as strangers. He had once danced here, in the late hours of the night when everyone else was asleep. He had danced to the very same tune that marked the end of his engagement to Tobio. <em>Tobio</em>, he thought sullenly. Having once incurred his ire, and later his rage, Shouyou wondered what the prince would do when he found out about this new plan. Did he know what the former king had wanted for him? Would he have accepted Shouyou’s help? Or would he just resent him all the same?</p>
<p>Suddenly, Shouyou wondered about the plan Tooru had described. He hadn’t mentioned how an heir would fit into the picture, and he realized why that might be. Shouyou wouldn’t be able to make an heir, but that didn’t mean <em>Tooru</em> couldn’t. His head felt light while his heart dropped to his stomach. Tooru was going to marry him, and then take a concubine to create the next heir. Was this his future? Hurt was the adjective that best described his heart, but the feeling of it needed so much more. What would come next? A ceremonial robe to wear down the aisle, and then laying in his bed as Tooru consummated his marriage with the wrong person? Would Shouyou even mind? What hurt more, that Tooru couldn’t love him or that Shouyou wanted him to?</p>
<p>“Shouyou…?” He finally looked up, and his vision cleared just enough to see his two brothers pushing the door open. Shouyou was just able to catch their expressions as they morphed from confusion to anger and surprise. Ryunosuke moved forward while Kei stayed in the doorway.</p>
<p>“Tooru said you might need us, but didn’t explain why,” Ryunosuke said softly, gathering Shouyou into his arms. He buried himself in their familiar warmth.</p>
<p>“He’s why you’re crying, huh?” Kei asked, a certain edge to his voice. Shouyou couldn’t bring himself to respond.</p>
<p>“If he thinks he can leave you here sobbing, then he’s got another thing coming,” Ryunosuke added above him. How quaint, a small voice in Shouyou’s head thought. His brothers were worried about him. It made it all the more difficult to raise his head and look his eldest brother in the eye.</p>
<p>“He’s not leaving me here.” Glancing to the side, Kei had joined their little group, and now both his brothers sported matching expressions of confusion. “King Tooru ended my engagement to his brother,” he took a deep, shuddering breath. “And created one with me instead.”</p>
<p>“WHAT?!” They said at the same time. Shouyou dug his head back into Ryunosuke, absently noting that it felt different when Tooru held him.</p>
<p>Kei recovered from the shock first. “And you accepted?”</p>
<p>“It wasn’t up to me. He and father decided this together, I didn’t know that’s what he planned.”</p>
<p>“So what you’re telling us is that he’s <em>forcing </em>you to marry him instead?”</p>
<p>Shouyou nodded. It sounded terrible when Ryunosuke put it that way, but really, isn’t that what happened?</p>
<p>“What now?” Kei asked.</p>
<p>“I don’t know.”</p>
<p>“Do you…like him?”</p>
<p>“I…don’t know.”</p>
<p>“He’s forcing you to marry him, and you don’t know if you like him? Did you hit your head?”</p>
<p>Shouyou could feel Ryunosuke hug him tighter before speaking. “Shouyou,” he said softly. “You…<em>want</em> to marry him, don’t you?”</p>
<p>“Not exactly,” he confessed. “I want him to <em>want </em>to marry me…I want him to <em>love </em>me.” It was the difference between his feelings for Tobio and his new feelings for Tooru. With Tobio, he had known it would take time for the man to consider him as a romantic partner, and he accepted that if anyone was going to fall in love first, it would have to be Shouyou himself. It was a stark contrast with Tooru. He had been told, upfront, that Tooru wouldn’t love him, <em>couldn’t</em>, love him. And yet, Shouyou wanted it. Wanted to be loved by the man, loved to the point of marriage.</p>
<p>“But it doesn’t matter. He told me he couldn’t love me anyways, and whatever kindness he’s given me has only been from his station, nothing more.”</p>
<p>“Oh Shouyou.” It had been a long time since Kei looked at him with so much sympathy, and brotherly affection.</p>
<p>“Did he say that, exactly?” His eldest brother asked above him.</p>
<p>“What do you mean?”</p>
<p>“I mean, did he tell you that he couldn’t love you, or are you assuming things again?”</p>
<p>He blinked as he considered the question. Tooru’s ‘I can’t’ floated back to his mind. Did he actually mean that he couldn’t say anything <em>because </em>he had fallen in love? No, no, Tooru couldn’t have. He barely knew Shouyou, had barely interacted with him. There was so many other reasons Tooru extended kindness to him, and love was not one of them. He said as much to his brothers, although, neither looked particularly convinced, and he tried a different avenue.</p>
<p>“Would someone who loved me use me to protect his own political standing?”</p>
<p>Neither Ryunosuke nor Kei could answer, and Shouyou wasn’t sure he wanted them to.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>Shouyou hadn’t been awake the last time he was in a carriage, but he wished he was asleep now. Tooru refused to look or speak to him. Perhaps he had blamed Shouyou for the murderous looks Kei and Ryunosuke had when they left. Perhaps he realized what a mistake it was to agree to marry him and was now upset he put himself in such a position. Perhaps he had offended Tooru by practically laying against him and crying so openly. It hurt. It hurt to know that the man before him couldn’t even stand him anymore, and probably <em>would </em>never be happy with him, much less love him. It hurt to know he still wanted it.</p>
<p>The silence that had defined their relationship thus far carried now into the trip back to Seijoh. What even <em>was </em>their relationship? He glanced over at the King, biting back a sigh when he saw how furrowed the man’s brows were. For as long as he’s known Tooru, Shouyou had only ever considered him as Tobio’s older brother, his own future brother-in-law. Now? Tooru was someone he was going to marry, and as his brothers pointed out, <em>wanted </em>to marry, on some level. When he told them he wanted Tooru to love him to the point of marriage, he didn’t refute that he would accept it. However, that realization seemed to pale in comparison to his present problems, namely, Tooru was looking at him.</p>
<p>Of course, Shouyou could only see this in his periphery, but the new King was <em>definitely </em>watching him. He shifted in his seat, wondering what Tooru was thinking about. Maybe he was reflecting, and just happened to be looking at him, or perhaps…Shouyou smiled to himself. Perhaps, Tooru was falling in love with him in that very moment, the afternoon sun cascading through the window and setting his bright orange hair aglow. The only problem with such a scenario was that the sun wasn’t shining on him, and he was engulfed in the shadowed part of the carriage. Tooru wasn’t falling in love with him, and probably never would. The sooner he accepted that, the sooner he could get back to pretending he was okay with it. Maybe he would just always pretend, from this moment on, he hadn’t begged Tooru to confess his hatred, his apathy. He could go on, pretend the ghost of Tooru’s arms around him didn’t stay in his mind. He could stay quiet, just as he planned, just as he should’ve. He could, he could…he <em>couldn’t</em>.</p>
<p>He took in a sharp breath, unable to help it, and curled in on himself, forcing his face into the wall of the carriage. He could feel Tooru shift around, as if perturbed by something, but settled all the same. Shouyou urged his tears to fall silently, each sob moving through him with a vengeance, wanting to be known. Why was it so hard to accept? Why did it have to be him?</p>
<p>His mind wandered, as if walking away from his own feelings. It wandered to that familiar place of play pretend. Tooru was just about to reach out, engulf him with his weight, confessing softly that he had fallen in love with Shouyou at first sight, and couldn’t say anything because he was engaged to Tobio. Tooru was holding himself back, wishing desperately he could tell him how much Shouyou meant. Tooru was about to say all these things when the carriage would knock over and they would be forced to run away into the wilderness, forced to rely only on each other for protection and safety. They would be forced to sleep in each other’s arms as the nights grew colder, and both would pretend they didn’t have another choice.</p>
<p>Shouyou hid himself from whatever expression Tooru could have been making and as the ride extended, his tears stopped flowing. He was sure it wasn’t from a lack of cause, but rather a lack of hydration. Subtly as he could, Shouyou wiped at his face, hoping to erase any indication of his momentary weakness. He took deep breaths and tried to settle himself. Perhaps it took longer than he thought it would, for the carriage began rocking to a stop and Tooru was leaving it. He had half a mind to reach out and grab his free hand.</p>
<p>Instead, Shouyou followed the King out, coming face to face with the castle he thought he would never see again. Like the first time he stood here, it loomed over him, but now, it was Shouyou who felt like he would crumble underneath its weight. Someone stood beside him.</p>
<p>“Don’t freak out, but I think my brother and advisor are about to yell at me.”</p>
<p>Shouyou had little time to even process the words, let alone formulate a response to them, when a low and angry voice called out to them. He looked down from the whole of the castle to just the top of the stairs. There, Tobio and Hajime stood. Shouyou had seen Hajime from more of a distance, orbiting around Tooru like a duck in a pond swimming lazily. He didn’t know what to make of the dark expression the man wore. Tobio, on the other hand, had a strangely calm expression, but as he got closer and seemed to notice the lack of space between his brother and Shouyou, it was easy to see the calm was a façade. There was a storm brewing just under his brow, and Shouyou reached out, just to have something to hold on to. That something wrapped around his hand, warmly. He wanted to pull away, apologize for the contact, but Hajime was upon them first.</p>
<p>“Where have you two <em>been</em>?” He said gruffly, crossing his arms in front of him as if he hadn’t just stomped down the steps. “I wake up only to find out my King and a foreign prince have just <em>disappeared </em>and-“ his eyes narrowed onto their clasped hands dangerously. Tooru pulled him closer.</p>
<p>“Ah yes, well, there’s a good explanation for that, but I think it’d be best if we discussed this <em>inside</em>,” and with that, Tooru pushed past the man, barely even looking in Tobio’s direction, who had <em>just </em>joined them. Shouyou wanted to say something, but his mouth felt dry and his hand felt clammy as he was being pulled away. This wasn’t right. They passed through the entrance, breezing by the curious stares of servants.</p>
<p>Finally, they came to a stop and Tooru still hadn’t let go of his hand, not even as he opened the door for the both of them. Shouyou made the decision for him and disentangled their fingers as he stepped into the room. It appeared to be an old classroom. Shouyou recognized the tall wall of textbooks and related scholastic material. He had studied alongside his brothers, once, in a room like this. There were three different desks present, the largest being situated at the far side of the room from the door. The two smaller ones were at an equal distance from the other two, creating a triangle. He walked up to the one on the left and dragged a finger across the wood. He cut a clean line through a layer of dust and wondered, why did Tooru drag him <em>here</em>?</p>
<p>Just then, the hair on the back of his neck rose and he half turned, seeing Tooru was staring at him. Had he just crossed another line, another invisible boundary set arbitrarily? He hated that his first instinct was to apologize for the slight.</p>
<p>He opened his mouth.</p>
<p>Hajime and Tobio walked through the door, sporting matching expressions of distaste.</p>
<p>He closed his mouth.</p>
<p>“Good, now that we’re all here, what the hell did you do, Tooru? Shouyou over there looks like he’s about to pass out.” Hajime pointed at him, and all three other men seemed to give him a once over. Shouyou would <em>not </em>notice that Tooru’s gaze stayed on him the longest.</p>
<p>“Well, you see,” the man said as he started speaking. He moved forward, coming to stand next to Shouyou, gently grabbing his left hand once more. He held it up, displaying the back of Shouyou’s hand to the two other men.</p>
<p>“We’re getting married.”</p>
<p>Shouyou thought he should comment, even just to himself, about how casual that statement was, but he was distracted. Actually, he must’ve been distracted for a while. When had Tooru slipped a ring on his finger? He stared at the older man, trying to picture when he had a chance to sneak the ring on him.</p>
<p>“You’re <em>what</em>?” Tobio’s voice brought Shouyou back to the present. The prince seemed angry. Once again, Shouyou pulled his hand out of Tooru’s and held it closer to him. Tobio was looking between them, like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Suddenly, he moved from his spot on the floor, all at once appearing in front of Shouyou. He shoved Tooru away and then roughly grabbed Shouyou’s arms.</p>
<p>“Were you sleeping with my <em>brother</em>?” He hissed.</p>
<p>“What?!”</p>
<p>“Don’t play dumb! I’ve seen the way he looks at you, why else would you accept it?”</p>
<p>Shouyou was at a loss for words, but something deep within him burned at the accusation. Tooru moved back to his side, throwing Tobio off of him and taking his place. The older man looked down at him, eyes strangely soft, moving back and forth over his face.</p>
<p>“Are you okay?” Tooru whispered softly, rubbing small circles into the spots Tobio had roughly pressed. It was too tender, too soft, too caring. Too much. He took a step back, something hardening in his heart.</p>
<p>The three men before him stared openly, varying levels of concern and hesitation across their faces. They seemed stiff, even Tobio was haltingly open armed, as if he had frozen in place. They were waiting for something to happen, ostensibly, something that only Shouyou could do.</p>
<p>Cry. They were waiting for him to <em>cry</em>. Is that how they saw him? Is that all he could do, all he could accomplish? Bitterly, he realized it was the truth. All he had done since arriving to this accursed castle was crying. Crying over his lot in life, crying over how distant his fiancé felt to him, crying over the end of his engagement, crying over the creation of a new one. And now? He was expected to cry over…what? Being yelled at by the man he could have loved? Being comforted by the man he wanted to love? How much longer will he be judged against this one dimensional character trait?</p>
<p>The hardness in his heart snapped and he let the consequences narrow his eyes. “No, I don’t think I am.” He glanced between the three of them, letting his gaze settle on Tobio in particular.</p>
<p>“How dare you.” He stared the man down. Tobio had at least the mind to look surprised. Shouyou pressed it further. “Even if it was true, even if I did pick him over you, <em>you </em>have no right to complain about it. Wasn’t it you who said I was nothing but a burden? Wasn’t it you who said you never wanted to see me again?” Anger pricked behind his eyes, and it hurt trying to hold it in. The shock registering on Tobio’s face didn’t make him feel better. He could feel, however, Tooru stiffen beside him and saw Hajime’s eyes go wide with surprise.</p>
<p>“I, I didn’t mean it,” Tobio said quietly, all the fight bleeding out of him.</p>
<p>But Shouyou wasn’t ready for such an early victory. “Oh? Is that right? I would’ve loved to know before your brother decided to marry me! You had more than enough time to come clean and apologize, why didn’t you?”</p>
<p>“I was going to! I was going to apologize and ask for another chance, and when I went to your room, you were gone!”</p>
<p>“Another chance? <em>Another chance</em>?” Shouyou could hear his own voice rising in pitch. “You hardly made use of your <em>first </em>one! You were given <em>three months </em>to know me and you <em>wasted </em>them!”</p>
<p>“Because I thought you understood I <em>liked </em>you!” Tobio thundered. Shouyou took a step back, accidentally bumping into the other desk, but Tobio was continuing. “I thought you knew I <em>liked </em>being around you, without having to talk about trivial matters! I thought that <em>you </em>enjoyed it!”</p>
<p>“All that time…” Shouyou barely trusted his own voice. “All that time you sat in silence, watching me read…you <em>liked </em>me?”</p>
<p> “I do.” Not past tense, not previously. <em>Currently</em>. It was too much. It was too much. Hysteria overtook Shouyou as he moved away from all three of them, facing the wall of books. <em>This </em>was where they were raised, where they formed values and personalities and ideas about the world. <em>This </em>is where the headaches of Seijoh were formed and molded into the two princes behind him. His vision finally began to blur.</p>
<p>“That’s just grand, isn’t it?” He could feel a tear escaping, and then another one. “All the things you said to me, your own unwillingness to ask what <em>I </em>felt, and you still feel entitled to me?” Shouyou turned on his heel, taking in all three men before him. Hajime looked lost, like he didn’t know who’s side to be on. Tobio looked as bitter as he felt and Tooru? He looked so <em>guilty</em>. Good.</p>
<p>“I won’t pretend I didn’t understand what you just confessed, but I won’t accept it either. It was up to you to say something sooner, and now you will never know if I would have accepted,” he said to his former fiancé. Shouyou then turned to his new one, and drew himself up to his full height, which wasn’t much but he used it anyways.</p>
<p>“Tooru, you deemed it necessary to marry me instead. Congratulations, you now have me. Do not mistake my modesty for inaction. I will not be a silent monarch. I expect to be included in all decisions from here on out. Please do not dishonor me anymore than you already have.” Something shifted in the air, the cause of which he could only guess at. Perhaps none of the people present, himself included, imagined he was capable of such curt speech. Perhaps the questioning look Hajime had finally settled on took on a shade of irritation – on behalf of Tooru, or at him? Perhaps Tobio’s blank expression was his way of communicating his displeasure with this conclusion of their relationship. It didn’t matter. Shouyou was done with this conversation.</p>
<p>He nodded at the men, said a short goodbye, and made his way out of the room, closing the door behind him. Now, in the quiet of the hall, the weight of the castle finally crashed down upon him. He was really going to be…what? A king? A queen? Tooru’s plan was without precedent. No kingdom had ruled with two monarchs of the same gender before, what would happen to them? As much as he hated the idea, he <em>did </em>know he would have to sit down with Tooru at some point and talk about all of this.</p>
<p>The sound of his clicking heels became deaden in his ears as he suddenly wondered if Tooru had <em>ever </em>planned on including him in his rule. That stung, and quite terribly. His breath shuddered and he stopped walking, just for a moment, just so he could lean against something. Tooru hadn’t indicated Shouyou would be needed for anything beyond the late king’s original plan, right? He absently twisted the ring around his finger. He couldn’t let that happen. He couldn’t resign himself to the fate of a quiet companion, he couldn’t become the husband of a king and refuse to have any say in the country’s wellbeing. Even so…</p>
<p>“Prince Shouyou!” Someone called behind him.</p>
<p>He blinked. Turning on his feet, letting his other shoulder rest on the wall, he came face to face with Hajime. Of the three people he left behind, he didn’t imagine it would Hajime to chase after him. He couldn’t tell if he’d rather had Tooru or Tobio in front of him now.</p>
<p>“Look,” Hajime said, coming to a stop, locking eye contact with him, “I can’t stand Tooru.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry?”</p>
<p>“That really should be my line. As his advisor, it’s up to me to keep him in check and to stop him from making decisions like this on his own.”</p>
<p>“I understand, I’m not exactly your first pick either, I assume?”</p>
<p>“…I won’t patronize you and claim otherwise, but this is the decision that he’s made, and as my king, I have no choice but to support it. However, that doesn’t make it any easier on you, and I will be supporting you as well. If you ever need anything, even just someone to talk to, I can be that person.”</p>
<p>Shouyou felt touched. He hardly knew him, or anyone really, and yet Hajime was extending a hand to him. Of course, a dose of realism stained the moment and he couldn’t help but feel wary.</p>
<p>“I’m grateful, but how do I know you won’t just report back to him everything I say?”</p>
<p>Hajime chuckled. “You’re pretty sharp, aren’t you? I can’t promise that every thing you might mention stays between us, but isn’t it better than having no one at all?”</p>
<p>“I suppose you’re right. How,” Shouyou hesitated, glancing behind Hajime back towards the room they had left. “Are they…?”</p>
<p>“They’re upset with each other, and themselves I gather. I didn’t know Tobio felt that…strongly about you, and I won’t even begin to try to understand what’s going through Tooru’s mind about it all.”</p>
<p>Shouyou sighed. Of course, the two brothers had to <em>both </em>terrible at communication, but then again, perhaps Shouyou himself wasn’t all innocent. If he had only asked Tobio for <em>more</em>, initiated conversations, made it more clear what he wanted…but it was useless to focus so much on the what if. He was done putting his feelings aside for others.</p>
<p>“So, you’re the chief advisor, what advice do you have for me?”</p>
<p>Hajime stared at him, as if seeing him for the very first time. “Advice?”</p>
<p>“I’m going to be Tooru’s husband, yet I barely know anything about Seijoh or even what Tooru <em>wants </em>for his country. I would like to at least know that, and what I can do to help.”</p>
<p>"You might be more fit for this than I thought.”</p>
<p>Shouyou definitely hoped so.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Tbh, I've been really excited for this chapter. I really wanted to get to the angry Shouyou part of the story and I hope I portrayed his frustration well! Also, as a heads up, next week's chapter may not update on time since school is kinda needing a lot of my attention rn. That being said, I will definitely try to stick to the update and will not abandon this fic! Thank you all for the kudos and comments, it means a lot, and thank you for reading! Tune in next week (hopefully) for more!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oh my gosh the Oihina brain rot is real I just really wanted to get this out there. I'm not sure what my updating schedule will be yet but I do plan on updating at least once a week. As of right now, I already have seven chapters written and I think this will end with about ~twelve in total. This isn't like anything else I've written so I appreciate anyone reading it. That being said, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed! Tune in next time for the Oikawa supremacy agenda!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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